menjadi lecturer

semenjak memulakan tugas ni, memang tak menang tangan nak buat kerja.

hmm...i thought working to get my phd was tough enough, rupanya dunia pekerjaan adalah lebih mencabar. Sekarang ni, bila jadi lecturer, tugas kita bukan semata-mata bagi lecture, malah kena juga buat research, fight to get grants, publish articles, present at conferences. On top of that, you are also involved in multiple admin work, ie: kena jadi ajk itu ini, help out with program itu ini and etc. *lap peluh*

I have been so busy that there are hardly room for me to breathe! On top of that, there's the school run. My days are so loonnggg....it starts really early and ends really late. Yesterday I actually wondered if Dr Sunshine can survive if I wasnt around...if I yang kena oncall or pergi kursus. Why? Sebab basically, I yang uruskan anak pergi sekolah, pack their bags, iron their clothes, make sure their breakfasts are ready, that they wake up to mandi, do the laundry, make sure theres dinner on the table. Semalam dalam I rasa tak larat pon, I had to pull myself up cos nak kena iron Andi's school uniform cos Dr Sunshine sangat busy prepare presentation for today.

Hmm...kalau nak cakap pasal stress, I rasa I pon stress juga (cos Dr Sunshine semalam cakap jgn ganggu dia sbb dia stress nak prepare presentation). I have a lot of things which I kena accomplish at work and my 'work' doesnt end there, when I am home, I have more work to do!!!

Honestly, I never bring work home because I know I will never be able to do it. Dr Sunshine kadang2 heran and tanya, you tak de keja ke, bila tengok i rehat kejap (lepas sidai kain or basuh pinggan or mandikan anak2). I do. I memang banyak kerja cuma I choose not to bring work home. Bila nampak I seolah-olah tak ada kerja, then I guess dia rasa dia lebih busy dari I. :(

Hmm....I rasa orang yang jadi lecturer je yang faham how:

a. stressful it is to be asked to teach a subject that you are not familiar with. That means you'll have to study the subject really well...and on top of that kena prepare lecture notes pulak tu!!
b. we have to strive to get our articles published. Kalau tak kang tak cukup KPI pulak kan?
c. kita kena fight to dapat grants so that we can gerakkan our research. no grant, no research. no research, how to get datas for articles that we were supposed to publish???
d. endless admin stuff to do.
e. layan karenah pelajar....

jadi, jgn hairan if i tertidur while feeding aaron. tak payahlah komen yang i tidur cepat hari ni or hairan why i nmpk penat sangat. cos you dont know what i go through every single day. you think its very easy, but it is not.