pernah tak?

Pernah tak uols dah siap tulis paper, pastu risau if the paper is not good enough? haiyaa...i am now at that juncture. But, i am actually not sure if its my pregnancy hormones that are causing this. I tell you, lately, dok risau pasal macam2 and i remember feeling this way when I was preggers with AA as well.

Whatever it is, I have emailed the lecturer my paper, with a nota cinta. wakakak. I actually told her that I am willing to make corrections and review the paper again to ensure that I get a good grade for her subject! Lets hope she will be ok with that. I hate this feeling of not being sure!!

Anyway, since that paper is done, I have two more papers to go. 1 tu, group work, so, I must wait for my group members, hence cannot do anything about it. One more is a methods paper, which is due in Mid April. I plan to submit it by end of March tho, and I plan to use the paper for my methods chapter in my thesis. Some stuff which I need to do to make the paper better, in my oppinion, is to do more literature search to justify the methods which i plan to utilise. So, this week will be used for that purpose. Lagipon, classes will commence next week, and I will have classes almost every day!! Maka, kena bertungkus lumus la jugak nanti nak siapkan kerja ni.

I am currently doing corrections on a paper I am going to present in a conference in May. Sebenarnya, rasa mcm dah siap. But i think I would have to print it out, and take it to Stabux and edit it sesambil minum iced chocolate. hehe. *matila alasan! The thing is, I really believe in putting it aside for a few days, before coming back to it untuk membuat corrections. Sebab apa tau, sebab masa tu konon-konon boleh have a fresh view on that paper. Hehe. Tiba2 terfikir, kenapalaaaa masa undergrad dulu tak mengamalkan cara kerja macam ni yek?

Hokei. Want to search for some books to borrow and then nak pi jenjalan cari birthday present, again! Harap-harap kali ini misi i berjaya.

Peringatan

Just want to remind uols, if you are parents to children who are born in 2005 or 2006. You can start registering for your child's primary education beginning 1st March, online.

God knows, walaupun ai tinggal jauh di sini, tanpa salinan sijil beranak AD, tetaplah tugas ai untuk mendaftar anak i dekat that website ittew. Tapi ai tak kesah sebab ai memang suka part part isi borang dan part part sibuk pasal hal-hal persekolahan anak ni. hehe. Nanti, dah siap2 isi borang bagai, baru Dr Sunshine akan ambil alih tugas menghantar borang together with the documents needed.

OMG...anak mak dah nak masuk darjah 1 in 2 years !!!! *gasp*

nak bagi apa ni?

i think it is so hard to think of what to get a guy for his birthday. cuba kalau birthday perempuan. senang kan. beli je handbag or shoes or jewellery or kitchen appliances (ok, maybe thats just me...hikhik)

I have been wrecking my brains, thinking of what to get Dr Sunshine for his birthday. Keluar masuk kedai sampai sakit belakang, tapi to no avail. what?? what should i get him? i am so confused!!!

i rasa kan, maybe i'll just get him a belated birthday gift lah. mungkin nak belikan dia coffee maker, and i bawak balik masa summer nanti. ok tak? kalau idak, i have been thinking of getting him a new wallet or a new belt. the belt i like ada di mulberry tapi kat sini plak, mana ada mulberry store. *sigh*. pastu, memang la ai minat tgk melalui gambar, but i would like to see it in person as well. pastu wallet. i know that he doesnt like bulky and big ones. so yg paling sesuai would be a tri-fold wallet. tapi tak jumpa plak tri-fold wallet yg menarik di hati.

jadi, mungkin beli coffee maker je la kan?? what say you??

tak de mood

Pernah tak uols rasa geram, sampai tak de mood nak buat keje and rasa nak mengunyah ajer? Mujur la ai posa, kalau tak, entah apa dah ai makan nieh!

Geramnya Ya Rabbi dengan obgyn I. The thing is, she didn't advice me to register at the hospital i plan to give birth at during the earlier part of my pregnancy. Masa dah 21 weeks baru dia nak bagitahu ai. I thought it wouldnt be much of a problem because when I was pregnant with Andi, I registered at 20++ weeks as well and senang je nak dapat appointment and slot.

Rupanya, ramai pulak laaaa yang nak beranak time-time summer ni kan. *tensi*

The hospy of my first choice only had a free slot in May, 4 weeks before my due date! Mana sempat uols. I nak kena buat organ screening bagai and etc kan. By 35 weeks of gestation, mana laaa nak boleh ukur baby bagai sebab baby dah besaq.

So, I called another hospital, and the other hospital said that its already full and i was too late katanya dalam membuat appointment.

So, sekarang cemana?

Lagi satu, i takut kena marah sebab tak buat organ screening tu uols! tapi its not my fault is it? i cannot get a bloody appointment. Ni yang buat my blood go upstairs ni.

Apa pon, to be safe, I still made the appointment with hospy #1, walaupun dah lambat gila. yela...at least adalah i tempat nak beranak kan? kalu tak?? cuma, tak boleh nak buat organ screening je. tu, dia kata, kena laa keluarkan duit sendiri untuk membuatnya. uols yg duduk kat mesia tu, silalah bersyukur sebab kos ultrasound and organ screening bagai murs murs je. Kat sini, sekali ultrasound, €50 (tupon, nasib baik dapat buat free 3 kali insurans tanggung). and, the organscreening, nak tahu tak berapa kosnya? €195. Tu yang i sibuk nak try juga dapat appointment kat spital.

Haih....bila time-time camni, rasa nak balik Malaysia aja!! uwaaaaaaaaaaaaa.....

ok. jap.

i look forward to my skype time with the boys every day. walaupun hakikatnya, AD and AA would be wrestling on the bed, main tembak-tembak, minum susu or doing something else and not talk to me, its nice to watch them. :)

sometimes, i would have a hard time to talk to Dr Sunshine because riuh rendah dengan suara the boys wrestling or something. tapi sekali ni, AA was quiet. so, Dr Sunshine was a bit suspicious because u know la bebudak ni, when they are quiet, they are usually up to something.

Dr Sunshine: Andi, buat apa tu?

Andi: *senyap*

Dr Sunshine: Buat apa tu Andi?

Andi: *senyap*

Tetengok, dia tengah sibuk 'mengemas' dvd. taking it out from the case.

Dr Sunshine: Andi, papa dah cakap kan jangan main dgn dvd.

Andi: Ok papa...jap. Ani....mas (ajak AD kemas)

one time, dr Sunshine wasn't in the room. I could see Andi holding a small plastic which contained a piece of chocolate (yg dah pecah-pecah). he was playing with it for a while, and then baring. and of course, the chocs fell out from the plastic. He immediatly sat up when he realised chocs jatuh.

Me: Andi...chocolate jatuh, kemas cepat. nanti papa tengok papa marah.

Andi: Ok Mama.

Me: tengok

Andi: (Ke)mas mama. ok. jap. (ke)mas. (sambil bubuh the pieces of chocs in the small plastic)

Pastu, ada time tu, Dr Sunshine nak tukar diaper.

Dr Sunshine: Andi, jom tukar pampers.

Andi: (tak) Payah

Dr Sunshine: Kenapa tak payah?

Andi: Sebaaaaabbbbbbbb, nanak (tak nak).

And, i think he is really following his abang. AD suka polis, dia pon suka polis. On Monday, Dr Sunshine rushed home after work, only to arrive at 8 plus. dah sampai tu, ajak la bebudak balik. Dani tak nak balik, sebab ada roda2kl. Andi? dia pon nanak, sebab nak tgk jugak! pastu, dr Sunshine kata, masa tgk tu kan, tiba2 dia angkat sikit baju kat bahagian bahu tu, and cakap "pat wa wa hello poyis (empat dua dua hello polis)" seolah-olah tgh cakap on walkie talkie!!!

and today, Dr Sunshine bawak the boys to the playground. Dani was contented with the swings, slides, see saw. Andi? Dia sibuk pi join budak-budak besar (about 8-10 year olds) main bola sepak. He ran around with them sibuk going after the ball, but of course they did not kick the ball towards him, maybe takut will hurt him or something. Tahu tak dia buat apa? Masa orang tengah nak penalti kick,dia cepat-cepat lari towards the ball, took it and ran away with it. LOL!!!!

Needless to say, Dr Sunshine was soooo excited and is already thinking of buying him soccer boots (when he is older)!! Soccer lah, tennis lah, hmm,..all this athletic genes semua dari Dr Sunshine la nih.

sejuk perut ini

Today, I am bursting with pride. Dani had such a good report at his parent teacher meet!

My mom and sis went to meet the teacher, because husband had ot with his boss today. Anyway, i was woken up with a text from the very proud papa and also, the grandma. hehe.

Apparently, Dani is like the class leader (if you read a previous post, he sort of told me about it but Dr Sunshine and I were a bit sceptical sebab ingat he was simply saying it..hehe..teruk tol mak pak dia ni!). And, the teacher said that he can read, and she felt that its not that he memorizes the words, but he was reading it as he actually points to the words when reading. Dulu, masa baru2 belajar baca, he was simply memorizing. And, to top things off, the teacher actually asked his classmates yg tak berapa reti nak baca, to go ask Dani if they are not sure of the words or read with him. :)

Pasal solat, teacher said he concentrates while performing it (the school does practical solat every day). My mom pon cakap, nowadays, he would usually perform solat asar and maghrib at home, and she observes him and so far so good (cuma dia solat tu, ikut suka hati la kiblat kat mana..hehe..but important thing is, he knows the rukun and the bacaan). Cuma mak kata, part nak tulis-tulis tu, still can be improved. So mak has asked along to buy some books for Dani to practice his writing.

Apa pon, I am such a proud mama!! Syukur Alhamdullilah. I hope AA would follow AD's footsteps, tapi already my mom is telling me AA refuses to dengar mak baca fatihah before tidor dengan berkata no no nein. haih. takpe, every child is different, kan?

p/s: now my target is for AD to habis iqra' before he enters standard 1. *matila mama dia yang lebih-lebih!*

afz suchtig

i was reading this and realised how i am also quite clingy. ok...maybe not clingy, tapi addicted. boleh?

you see, one would thought that it would be impossible to be clingy to a significant other when you live like thousands of miles away kan. tapi, i think i just happened to be one!

every day, i would come back cepat-cepat from uni, to make sure i'd be online so that i can talk to him. Nevermind the fact that kadang-kadang he has to suddenly work late, or keluar main snooker, or tetiba keluar minum dengan kawan and i suddenly just get an sms saying "sorry tak leh online hari ni becos..."

every night, i sleep really late, like at 1am (=8am mesia), so that i can text him good morning. every. single. freaking. day! i never fail to do that although i was thinking that i should stop, but it has become a habit.

i email or fbmsg or text him anything that comes to mind. biarpon satu ayat je. like when this one time i was watching a malay cerekarama or telemovie ke apetah, and the main character's name was Andi. terus i email hokeh sebab first time dengar orang guna nama Andi on tv.

i find that i always call him when he's on called, sebab tak leh nak skype kan. hihi.

i sanggup bangun tetengah pagi kalau dengar my phone beeps sebab ada incoming text cos i know it would be from him!

i think about him most of the time. *blush*

honestly, maybe its because i have always had a crush on him waayyyyyyyyyyyy before he probably even knew i existed. hehe. up to this day, there are still moments when i would feel like i couldn't believe i married him. betul.

lepastu, bila baca macam-macam on the net about failed marriages, death of spouse, terus ai emo. ok, maybe because i am pregnant la kan tapi, bila baca benda2 macam tu, terus everyday doa that i will be his only wife di dunia dan akhirat.

i think its amazing how we managed to pull it off despite being physically far from each other. throughout my 5 years of marriage, about 3 years are spent apart. in our 6 years or dating sebelum kawen, we spent 4 years a part. so, thats like 7 years of long distance relationship, and another year to go.

i tell you, i have been married to this man for 5 years. i have been in a relationship with him for almost 11 years. tapi, there is not one single time that i am bored with him. (ok. tipu. mungkin masa2 gaduh ada rasa annoyed la kan...hihi).

all of my heart, forever.

pregnancy update

i met my obgyn today. i tell you, setiap kali jumpa dia, setiap kali tulah dia nak buat VE!!!! it is soooooooooooooooooooooooooo uncomfortable ok. Mak suci uols. *oppss* tadi, sebab dah tak tahan setiap bulan di'seluk', i tanya dia, why do you have to do it everytime? dia kata sebab nak cek if serviks saya tutup atau bukak. apakah??? adakah sy berisiko tinggi untuk dilate or what?? *stress*

pastu, dia hambik ultrasound thingy and probbed my belly untuk melihat heartbeat. dah jumpa, dia tolak2 perut saya because baby wasn't moving. dia tanya, when is the baby usually active?jawapan saya: in the evening.

padahal, masa kat waiting room tu, sibuk aja baby tendang2. bila masuk bilik doktor, elok je senyap and pose pose tidor kan? haih.

anyhoo, saya telah disuruh register kat spital beranak ASAP untuk membuat organ screening. nak register pon, nak kena buat appointment uols. makanya, esok kena kecek deutsch la gamaknya nak buat appointment tersebut. spital idaman adalah spital yg sama tempat AA dilahirkan. Dr Sunshine kata, haaa bagus...spital tu cantik and comfortable. ya. tapi ia juga agak jauh dari tempat tinggal sekarang. namun, sebab dia antara 3 spital yg menawarkan perkhidmatan organ screening percuma, i pasrah (if not, ai kena bayar 195euros uols!!!)

saya juga bagitau doktor, sy tak pasti nak beranak kat mesia atau sini. doktor kata takpe. pi je register. if tak jadi beranak sana, they will not prosecute you. ha....prosecute? wah wah wah... kaget kejap saya tadi sebab fenfeeling nanti kena tangkap polis gittew.

oh, then sy tanya doktor. bila kah waktu seswai utk saya balik pada hemat doktor? yela, long haul journey la katakan. rupanya, saya je yg lelebih concern pasal long journey bagai. sebab doktor kata, its up to the airline actually. u ols boleh je balik bila2 uols nak as long as kandungan uols healthy. gittew. so, nanti nak tripple confirm dgn airline idaman, bila boleh last balik. last time I checked, it was at 35 weeks, with doctor's letter.

Dr Sunshine pon cakap kat saya, tak yah balik awal-awal. balik bila dah last week yg airline bagi fly sebab katanya, perabihkan study awak ittew.

baek! *nanges jap sebab baru berangan nak balik awal*

ye la, konon2 saya risau la kan, if dah balik dah 36 minggu nanti tak sempat la nak check up kat KK nak dapat buku merah tu. buku kuning i adalaa..tapi bahasa german uols. cemana ai nak translate apa doktor tu tulis? dah la tulisan pon tulisan doktor. faham-faham je la kan. tapi suami ai kata, tu uols tak yah risau. semua boleh settle katanya. jadi, ai dah habis alasan dah untuk digunakan untuk balik awal.

maka, dengan ini, diumumkan, paling awal saya balik pon adalah pertengahan bulan may. sekian.

*nangis sambil tutup muka dengan bantal*

fenin

hmm.....uols tahu tak, prog phd i ni, memerlukan saya mengcompletekan bahasa german sampai level B2 (done!), dan juga hampir 70ECTS (ECTS tu kira kredit la kalu kat negara omputeh tu).

70 ECTS adalah sangaaaaattttttttttttttttttttttttt banyak. *pengsan*

on top of that, you are supposed to decide what subjects you want to take and read the course descriptions (yang most of it in deutsch) untuk membuat keputusan. No, they ols tak de la list kursus yang they would suggest to take so you can basically register for any courses which you feel would contribute to your research nanti.

now, saya sedang konpius. saya konpius sebab tak tahu sama ada i will get ects if register utk courses offered for MA students. haih. i tell you....sangat memeningkan hokeh!!!! oleh itu, saya agak stress sekarang memikirkan nasib saya.

On top of that, saya risau sebab saya kan pregnant. makanya, saya mungkin akan miss a like 2 to 3 classes sebab nanti nak beranak kan. how??? haih. i hate this risau feeling. this is the EXACT same feeling i had when i was sooooooooooooo unsure of everything when i first came here. saya rasa nak menangis pon ada. hmm...mungkinkah ini disebabkan oleh hormon saya??

whatever it is gang, tolong doakan kursus that i registered for, would be counted for my ects untuk phd nanti yer.

sekian.

how much is too much

i don't know why, but i seem to find many parents giving ipad as birthday presents to their children, yang sesetengah tu, baru je masuk 2 years old. well, i guess they are lucky and fortunate enough to have lots of rezeki walopon ada gak yg dok pinjam2 duit orang tapi tayang baru beli ipad for anak kat fb, to be able to provide for their child. i heard, some download flashcard apps and other 'educational' tools untuk their kids.

adakah saya akan succumb to pembelian ipad untuk anak juga? err...tak kot. sebab apa. at that age (two, i mean), dorang maybe tak reti jaga the barang properly. and for something so pricey (for me), pembelian barang2 gadget ni mungkin have to wait until they are mucccchhhhhhhhhhhhh bigger and can appreciate it at face value. heck, my laptop screen (its touchscreen) comot-comot dengan fingerprints dani when he uses it to watch his youtubes and etc. at one time, i was contemplating to get AD a kidstough digital camera, but didnt because its kinda pricey, and lets face it, at three (that was the age masa i thought of buying him that), he will only be interested with it for about a week. hehe.

lagipon, i think its good to let them be and act their age. main dengan kotak and periuk and happy even when i bagi main dengan sudu (or maybe thats just my boys. lol). sometimes, its just wrestling, or main tembak2 dengan imaginary gun. naik basikal. main bola. baiki kereta and motor. kissing machine (a game i invented with the boys). main slides kat playground. ha...ni bagus ye. i love to bring them to the playground because they would be so tired that lepas mandi, dinner terus zonked out! hehe.

AA with his imaginary gun

wrestling

tapi, that is just my two cents. would you get your toddler an ipad?

p/s: in an unrelated matter, Dr Sushine was driving home when dia dengar AA bising2 macam hentak2 somthing on the chair. he turned to find AA holding his (Dr Sunshine's tennis racket) with the right grip, ala-ala nak buat back hand. Needless to say, Dr Sushine was super happy and was bursting with pride. LOL.

vba2c

today, i am going to let you in on a little secret.

tahu tak (ok..obviously uols tak tahu if its a secret!), sometimes, i regretted for not being patient enough when i experienced contraction pain while being preggers with AA. At times, I wished that i tahan-ed the pain, really counted the jarak contractions, instead of calling the ambulance. tapi, seingat i pada malam ittew, i mintak pertolongan Dr Sunshine to konon kira how far apart were the pain, but, i guess he was tired and etc that he said, if you were in kl, i would have brought you to the hospy. *sigh* so that was that. no svd for me. tapi apa pon, i am still thankful that i gave birth to a gorgeous baby boy. :)

so, this time around, i tried googling if there are any chances of me doing a vba2c, and apparently, they are allowing it in the US! katanya, chances of uterine rupture is less than 1 per cent and it is not any more dangeorus than doing a c-sect. so, berkobar-kobar sikit la semangat iols nak try for vba2c ni kan.

sekali....encik suami tak setuju. o well. syurga di bawah tapak kaki suami kan. what to do. takpe...dgn teknologi sekarang, you can go for a lot of c-sect. bukan setakat tiga sahaja. cuma, now, what i really want is, for the obgyn to allow me experience the labor pain, before operating on me. alasan? to make sure that baby is ready to go out. rasa-rasa, doktor bagi tak ek?

ok jap

i look forward to my skype time with the boys every day. walaupun hakikatnya, AD and AA would be wrestling on the bed, main tembak-tembak, minum susu or doing something else and not talk to me, its nice to watch them. :)

sometimes, i would have a hard time to talk to Dr Sunshine because riuh rendah dengan suara the boys wrestling or something. tapi sekali ni, AA was quiet. so, Dr Sunshine was a bit suspicious because u know la bebudak ni, when they are quiet, they are usually up to something.

Dr Sunshine: Andi, buat apa tu?

Andi: *senyap*

Dr Sunshine: Buat apa tu Andi?

Andi: *senyap*

Tetengok, dia tengah sibuk 'mengemas' dvd. taking it out from the case.

Dr Sunshine: Andi, papa dah cakap kan jangan main dgn dvd.

Andi: Ok papa...jap. Ani....mas (ajak AD kemas)

one time, dr Sunshine wasn't in the room. I could see Andi holding a small plastic which contained a piece of chocolate (yg dah pecah-pecah). he was playing with it for a while, and then baring. and of course, the chocs fell out from the plastic. He immediatly sat up when he realised chocs jatuh.

Me: Andi...chocolate jatuh, kemas cepat. nanti papa tengok papa marah.

Andi: Ok Mama.

Me: tengok

Andi: (Ke)mas mama. ok. jap. (ke)mas. (sambil bubuh the pieces of chocs in the small plastic)

Pastu, ada time tu, Dr Sunshine nak tukar diaper.

Dr Sunshine: Andi, jom tukar pampers.

Andi: (tak) Payah

Dr Sunshine: Kenapa tak payah?

Andi: Sebaaaaabbbbbbbb, nanak (tak nak).

And, i think he is really following his abang. AD suka polis, dia pon suka polis. On Monday, Dr Sunshine rushed home after work, only to arrive at 8 plus. dah sampai tu, ajak la bebudak balik. Dani tak nak balik, sebab ada roda2kl. Andi? dia pon nanak, sebab nak tgk jugak! pastu, dr Sunshine kata, masa tgk tu kan, tiba2 dia angkat sikit baju kat bahagian bahu tu, and cakap "pat wa wa hello poyis (empat dua dua hello polis)" seolah-olah tgh cakap on walkie talkie!!!

and today, Dr Sunshine bawak the boys to the playground. Dani was contented with the swings, slides, see saw. Andi? Dia sibuk pi join budak-budak besar (about 8-10 year olds) main bola sepak. He ran around with them sibuk going after the ball, but of course they did not kick the ball towards him, maybe takut will hurt him or something. Tahu tak dia buat apa? Masa orang tengah nak penalti kick,dia cepat-cepat lari towards the ball, took it and ran away with it. LOL!!!!

Needless to say, Dr Sunshine was soooo excited and is already thinking of buying him soccer boots (when he is older)!! Soccer lah, tennis lah, hmm,..all this athletic genes semua dari Dr Sunshine la nih.

tiramisu

you see, my AD and I are currently watching tiramisu, the tv show. and sometimes, we would sing the opening song together so one day, i youtubed the song because nak try hafal lirik (yes u ols, sanggup hokei nak hafal lirik bagai). tapi, masa mencari lagi ittew, terjumpa pulak resipi tiramisu and tahu tak, the recipe SANGAT senang, and tak memerlukan telur at all! selalu, yg i baca, tiramisu kena pukul telur seperately lah, etc. tapi dgn resipi ni, you get the same taste, minus the susah payah!!!

so, this is the recipe: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CY2eWtSEGqk

masa tgk tu, sila just mutekan the sound. cos org tu just bagi background music and no explaination whatsoever.

sila cuba. cos ingredients yang diperlukan sangat sedikit. and it literally took me only 15minutes (or even less) to prepare the dessert.

Anugerah Tuhan

You know what is an amazing conincidence?

Everytime I am pregnant, one of my best friends would be preggers as well!!!

Congratulations Nana!!! I am super excited. hehehe.....

So far, AD was born in the same year as ayang's NDS

AA pulak, satu batch dengan ayang's NIZ and iezma's H and tak jauh beza with tank's D.

Now, baby in tummy plak ada gang....hehehe....I LIKE.