rindunye

rindunya pada Dr Sunshine.

rindunya pada Andi dan Dani.

rindunya pada Mak.

rindunya pada Daddy.

Semalam, termenangis ingatkan Daddy. I know its not good to cry bila ingatkan arwah, tapi ter. Maka,terus I minta tolong Dr Sunshine pergi visit kubur Daddy.

Hari ini, hari terakhir dalam 2011.

2011 has been the year that I think I was most productive! I attended a lot of classes (about 60 credits worth ok!! in a year!!), wrote my thesis, beranak, renovate rumah.

i hope to go back in 2012 with a phd, inshaAllah.

Dan, i nak juga berterima kasih kepada ya Allah sebab berikan i kekuatan to hadapi what I have been through. Thank you so much for giving me a supportive husband. And tadi, masa tengah jalan-jalan dengan Aaron, it dawned to me hikmah Allah berikan ai boys, cos its easier for Dr Sunshine to jagakan. betul tak?

Anyway, I am in the midst of writing my final chapter, the conlcusion. Actually, I have been lazy and putting it off for the longest time. Ni,dah nak habis tahun 2011 baru tergocoh-gocoh nak siapkan. tsk. I hope I would be able to finish it today, cos next year (which is technically just esok) i dah kena start on my other assignments. :)

here's to the new year and to getting that phd!!!

sharing is caring #3

Firstly, Selamat Tahun Baru!!!

Ok, untuk sesi sharing is caring kali ni, I nak share dengan uols info terbaru yang I dapat. Apakah??

Pasal persekolahan anak-anak. hehe.

You see, I have been reading up about schools, because I just want to get more information on the types of schools available for Dani to masuk darjah 1. The more I read, the more interested I was on Sekolah Rendah Agama Integrasi (SRAI) which is available in some parts of Selangor. I think there are less than 15 such schools in all of Selangor.

Anyway, kenapa ai interested dengan sekolah ini? Because, it integrates normal school dengan sekolah agama. Hence, schooling hours is from about 8 to 4. Masa rehat pagi tu, lepas makan, ada solat dhuha. Masa rehat tengah hari tu, lepas makan, everyone solat asar. Best kan?

These schools are kelolaan JAIS, I think kategori sekolah bantuan penuh kot, but i am not sure. Tapi yang pasti, dia bukan private school, hence the fees adalah affordable. Nak masuk sekolah ni, ada entrance exam. Mainly because the number of people yang apply masuk are about 400 plus and they only take in about 150. So its really competitive, hence the need to organise for an entrance exam. The application to sit for the exam is usually announced in April and the exam itself will be in May, tahun sebelum anak uols masuk sekolah. Contohnya Dani will masuk darjah 1 in 2013, hence his exam will be in 2012.

I was looking high and low pasal format exam ni, and yang i jumpa dia dok kata banyak soalan yang suruh the kids suaikan, ada tanya maths, english, bm, jawi, arab. Arab?? yikes...terus sedikit panik di situ sebab anak ai tak belajar bahasa arab. Then, 2 days ago, i came across farwina's blog, left a comment and she was extremely kind!!! She shared with me some info.

Apparently, ada buku latihan yg spesifik bertajuk persediaan kemasukkan sekolah rendah agama integrasi. So, sesiapa yang berminat, boleh purchase the book.

Secondly, antara subjek yg budak2 akan belajar is: bm, bi, maths, pjk, bahasa arab K, bahasa arab J, tilawah, hafazan, sains, pendidikan islam, tauhid, jawi, feqah, akhlak, muzik, seni.

Needless to say, I am quite excited. hehe. But at the same time, I am quite worried cos Dani has no Arabic background. So, what I did was to tell my sis to bgtahu ustazah mengaji to teach him baca jawi. I hope sempat laaa by May, inshaAllah.

By the way, walaupun you are interested to send your kid to this school, you should still register him at the normal sekolah kebangsaan. Sebab kalau dia tak dapat tempat kat SRAI, u dah ada back up school for him.

Having said that, pemilihan sekolah totally depends on how you want to mold your kids. Ada argue that sending Dani to a sekolah agama at such a young age nanti buat dia tak kenal other cultures and mungkin tak bagi dia peluang to socialise with the other races. I thought about it as well, but bottom line for me is for Dani to have a good foundation in religion. He is also quite interested dengan hafal ayat and etc, so I think this is a good option for him. I also thought of sending him for some fun extra axtivity, so that he will be able to socialise with the other races. tapi tengoklah. tennis ke, swimming ke. hehe.

Plus, ada je Malays yang hantar their kids to sekolah cina and tamil, so that their kids will acquire a 3rd language (but dani will be learning arabic, so thats a third language as well). Thats cool as well. And ada yang siap research sekolah mana within their tempat tinggal yang the population of Malays, chinese and Indian are well represented sebab nak anak dia ala-ala 1 Malaysia. Pon ok, sebab honestly, I pon nk my sons to berkawan dengan everyone and not stereotype people.

So, pikirlah bebetul masa nak pilih sekolah. I have been researching about this since Dani was 5. Hover kan? wakakakakaa....

melagha

yes. dah tiga hari saya tak buat kerja. kenapa? sebab MALAS!!!

homaigawd. dah nak akhir tahun. tapi thesis tak siap siap!!

saya tinggal nak tulis conclusion jer uols!!! tapi tahap kemalasan tu, ya Rabbi. memang melampaui batas ok.

and, the thing is, i know that i malas!! tapi tetapla dok google apa nak beli for my trip to Paris nanti dan perkara-perkara yang tak berfaedah.

saya sungguh tak sedar diri okeh.


sebab, in january, saya kena prepare utk 1 presentation, 1 paper to submit, 1 exam dan juga nak submit thesis, inshaAllah.

On top of that, January jugaklah saya nak berjimba jimba. erkk...cemana nie??? *pengsan*

anyway, sebab nak happykan diri, i nak citer apa i plan to buy kat Paris, ok?

1. Pisau potong ayam jenama laguiole something like this http://www.laguiole-attitude.com/en/kitchen-knife/39-expression-luxury-kitchen-knife.html

2. sautee pan dekat kedai ini

3. cute kitchen stuff dekat sini.

4. a painting at one of the kedais along seine

5. macaroons

6. eat lots of chocolate croisant from blu sucre

7. cute coasters.

err...tu je that i can think of so far.

okla..maybe i should start doing my work. :)

7. have the best falafel in the world (kata new york times)

my little men

Dani

He is now soooooo into reading and spelling. Sekarang, he insists on chatting (as in typing what he wants to say) instead of talking to me on skype. Mula-mula, he started off with typing some random words like polis, up, down, insert (yes...ni dia tiru apa yang dia tengok dari keyboard computer..hehe). Then, as the week progresses, he started typing out questions (which he has prepared earlier with the help from Along, but dia tulis sendiri and Along tolong check je) like Aaron dah minum susu ke? Mama apa khabar?. And now, after about two weeks, he tries to type out his answers to the questions I throw at him like dah makan ke belum? Makan apa hari ni? I really think that this is a good spelling exercise *matila mama dia kiasu..hehe*

Other than that, Dr Sunshine bought his school bag already. :) Mula-mula he wanted the beg yang roda-roda but we (read: Dr Sunshine and me) thought that it wasn't cool (yes, mak bapak dia yang over! wakakaka) and Dr Sunshine brought him shopping the other day and he chose a non-roda bag. *phew!

Andi

Ha...apparently, this boy is getting cheekier by the day, according to my mom and Along. Katanya, he always cries to get things done his way but thank god my sis nor my mom give in to his cries!! Ada this one night ni, dia mengada and insisted nak baring on my mom's lap. And, because he had a good long nap that day, sampai pukul 1am pon dok nak baring atas lap dan tak tidur2 lagi. Nasib Along woke up and gave him a good talking to, barula dia nak tidur. Needless to say, I reported the kejadian to the Papa and he was told to not do that (bully my mom by sleeping on her lap) again.

So today, masa skype, he went on and on to tell me that he has been a very good boy today.

Andi: Mama...saya good boy tau hari ni. Good boy...
Me: Iye? Andi buat apa yang Andi good boy?
Andi: Hari ni saya tidur kat bawah.Tak tidur atas mak pon.Saya good boy
Me: Ooohh....bagus la Andi. Andi memang good boy. Anak mama memang good boy kan. Very good Andi.
Andi: *muka happy*

Tetapi, Andi is also quite lasak. Tadi dia cerita:

Andi: Mama, hari ni saya jatuh la mama.
Me: Macam mana boleh jatuh?
Andi: Sebab saya panjat grill, pastu jatuh.
Me: Errkk....(dalam hati dok kata..tadi baru je mama cakap good boy)

And, Andi bahasakan diri dia as Saya. But Dr Sunshine is trying to make him bahasakan diri as Andi. I personally think there is nothing wrong with him referring to himself as saya. hehe. its kinda cute actually. :)

Aaron
Oh, anak saya ini sekarang dah boleh membuat tour satu bilik. Masa dia belum expert mengesot, he is easily bored and slalu nak attention from me. Contohnya, he wakes up pretty early, like at 5.30am. Kadang-kadang 4.30am pon pernah. Kalau dulu, lepas dia bangun dan golek-golek kejap and main dengan his toys, sure I dengar dia o-ek. But now, he can go for a long time without crying. I can continue with my sleep (tapi kena make sure la dekat carpet tak de small items which he can put into his mouth and that the place is clean). He will usually start to bunyi-bunyi if he has done no 2 or dah ngantuk. :)

And, sekarang, he can sometimes fall asleep without susu. :) Lepas tu, you know at times babies wake up in the middle of the night? Well dulu automatically I bagi him susu. But now, he wakes up, and sometimes can fall asleep balik by himself. :) Macam tadi, I baru bagi dia susu, n he fell asleep. So I pon start la menaip kan. After a while, i heard him talking. Yes, he woke up and was moving around. I buat tak kisah. Pastu I dengar senyap je. So I turned around and saw him asleep. hehe. Alhamdulillah.

Oh, he has also started eating. I bagi dia nestum thingy. I dah try 2 flavour: pear&muesli and strawberry. He loves the srrawberry and tak suka Muesli. I rasa kan, maybe sebab yg straberry tu is also infused with milk whereas the pear-muesli tu tak. So esok, I ingat nak beli biscuit flavour pulak which was Andi's favourite dulu-dulu. :) Once, I made bubur with salmon but he does not like it!! hmm...maybe sebab salmon tu tak berapa fresh kot. Tapi I dah pesan ikan bilis from my mom. So nanti i can buat bubur ikan bilis.

p.s: after shielding my first two boys from coffee since they were babies, dr sunshine terbagi depa minum toffee nut latte. hmm...they loved it to bits. Aaron pulak dah rasa sikit-sikit kot from the milk. wakakakakak...

bila satu pintu tutup, pintu lain yg buka

uols,

i did not tell you all that i got an email last week from a reputable journal saying that my paper was not accepted for publication. :( needless to say, i was devatated. yela..ingat nak gak la kumpul2 journal articles so that bila balik nanti, cepat la sikit can baik pangkat. Namun, harapanku hancur berkecai gittew!! I was really dissapointed with myself and at one point, I even doubted my ability to write. over kan??

Tula. Siapa suruh set hopes up high sangat? Tapi orang kata, aim for the moon, if tak dapat moon, can still be among the stars.

Anyway, before this, i ada juga terima email, for a call for paper, to be published in a book. Its a joint effort by some European universities to provide a platform for post grad students to publish their work. But, I did not send in my abstract for that book because I already send that paper in for that journal kan. Maka, tak semena-mena, dua2 ai terlepas okeh!!! Tapi, you know what I did? I tebalkan je muka and send an email to the book editor tu, cakap, can I still submit my abstract even though deadline dah about 2 weeks ago. And he said yes!!!

So, I pon hantaq la abstract of my rejected journal article ittew, sebab dah kena reject kan by that journal.

And...today, I got my christmas present cos I just recieved an email saying that my abstract was among the 20 they selected. Alhamdullillah.

Sungguh pon, it would not be considered as a journal article and only a chapter in a book, I am still thankful and grateful for the opportunity. It will be a collaboration of people from all over the world, and I am pretty excited!!!

deadline for the manuscript is end of april. :)

ok..now back to editing my chapter. it is the last chapter to edit, before I start with my concluding chapter, tomorrow, inshaAllah.

Semoga semua dipermudahkan.

p.s: uwaaaaaaaa...nangis tengok bag MBMJ idaman hati on sale di neiman marcus punye website. hmm..kenapa laaa sini tak se sale macam tu? Apa pon, I am still going to try my luck and visit a local department store esok, usha2..mana tau ada sale kan!!! Plus, need to return a blouse to mng...and shop for some more. i am in a mission of collecting baju kerja as well. hehe.

sharing is caring #2

Sesi sharing is caring hari ini amat sesuai bagi semua orang, tidak kiralah sama ada anda adalah suri rumah yang tidak menang tangan dengan pelbagai house chores, mahu pon single mingle tapi tak de time nak fix a meal. Apakah??

How to make an easy pease pizza in 15 minutes!!!!!

Just make sure you have this in your pantry!

Tortilla roll or pita roll
Cheese
Spaghetti sos dalam botol (tapi guna tomato sauce pon boleh ajer)
tuna in a can

How to?
Spread tomato sauce/spaghetti sauce on to tortilla
spread tuna fillings
tabur cheese
bake in toaster or oven for about 7 minutes.
siap
MAKAN!!!

senang kan? senang kan? sedap pon sedap. You can use a variety of topping. Kadang-kadang, I rendam fresh udang before hand pastu time nak buat tu, kopek kulit and put it on the tortilla. SOmetimes, I cut up nugget pieces or sausages. Or if you have some left over ayamg goreng, can shred it. Or, pecah telur kat atas pon sedap gak!!!

Cuba try. Senang giller!!! Kalau nak buat for dinner, maybe can serve it with fries and salad. If for breakie, makan macam tu pon boleh.

Oh...there's also a sweet version. Potong pisang, spread gula and cheese (tak payah tomato sauce). SEDAAPPP...i rasa if lepas dah bakar tu letak chocolate sauce sure lagi heaven.

OK. Sila try!!!

tatuttt

hari ni mengerah tenaga to edit chapter 4 (which is now named chapter three). aiyoo...letih jugak ye, bila nak buat tables of contents semua tu, the numbering etc.

anyway, i tell you, dalam proses editing ni, terbanyak pula benda yang digodek dan ditukar. hehe. o well. i hope it makes sense. pasni nak godek chapter 5 and 6 (which would soon be chapter 4 and 5). i only have till this weekend to finish it. Pastu dah kena start writing my conclusion, by hook or by crook, senin dah kena start!!

Tahu tak pesal apa ai tatutt (andispeak: takut)?? sebab, january 17th, ada presentation dan jan 31st ada assignment nak kena submit and somewhere in january tu, ada exam!!! aiyaa.......rasa nak pengsan pon ada. tsk.

Yang terlebih cuak adalah kerana my friend will be comming from 20-29. am obviously going to entertain her and i forsee that i will not be doing any work!!! so, technically, i only have till the 20th to settlekan my assignment ittew. haiyaaaaaaaaaaaaa. tu belum masuk part presentation. but, i dah rasa mcm nak ambil isi dari my lecture from last summer to be used for the presentation. hehe. but still, i need to write it up, prepare powerpoint. tsk. die die die. maka, tu yang buat i cuak terlebih.yang assignment tu lagila uols!!! tak prepare apa benda pon. soalan pon ala-ala ingat-ingat gittew jer. tsk.

Oh..ditambah pula bulan jan akan jumpa SV dan finally discuss my hopefully finished thesis. So, dalam kepala saya, saya rasa macam akan submit it earliest in february.

Sis might come in february and we might be going to istanbul. hehe.

OKla...i think i should go prepare dinner and start editing sikit. :)

plan baru

have just finished editing my chapter 1. I have decided to merge my chapter 1 and chapter 2 together...hehe. Anyway, thats done, for now.

Esok, am dropping aaron off to his nenek angkats so that I can edit my chapter 4 and 5, inshaAllah. I think this is the best way because I really need my own time to be able to fully concentrate in editing. I did that last Tuesday and managed find some flaws and things which I need to correct. So, esok will do just that.

Bila balik rumah, barula type semula segala corrections ittew.

I am waayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy over my deadline!!! Apa pon, plan to start writing my conclusion by this weekend and have it ready, inshaAllah by the new year.

New year pulak, I must start on my assignments which i kena submit on 31 jan. Tapi besfren is coming from 20-29 jan and kami akan ke Paris. So, by hook or by crook, I must finish it before 20th. Pastu nak study for exam lagi. uwaaaaa....I can do this, right???

okla...nak tidur. need to wake up early tomorrow.

Semoga kita semua berjaya geng!!!

oh oh

yes. sekali lagi berjaya melepas deadline yang telah dibuat oleh diri sendiri. *tepuk tangan secara sakarstik*

today, I finally got to touch up my chapter 1 only to find out that it needs a lot of work. I just finished touching up but am now wondering if it needs to be peppered with more references and lit reviews. Tapi kan, bukan apa. Most of the lit reviews says the same things anyways so what I did was to select a few which said what I thought was needed. OK la kan? Hmm..Lagi satu, I macam nampak tak ada flow but tak leh fikir how to make sure it flows. Ke sebab dah baca banyak kali sampai tak nampak?

Then, I started on my tables of contents, tapi hanya ada chapter 1 aje on it. I thought that I will update it everytime I have done editing the respective chapters. Am up to chapter two pulak esok. Chapter two is kinda ok, except that I need to write a whole new conclusion for that chapter. Sebab apa? Sebab conclusion tu, lebih kurang sama macam my aims and rationales of thesis, which I used in chapter 1. So, I will devote my time to do that esok, and also edit that chapter dan buat penambah baikan. *chewah*

Next, is my chapter three. Chapter three ni, ada benda sikit nak tambah rasanya. Tapi sikit-sikit saje sebab this is one of the recent chapters I wrote which has been edited a few times already.

Chapter four tu, I rasa will take quite a while to edit because I wrote it quite a while ago. Then five and six, also quite recent so should be able to do it quite fast. Lepas habis semua, akan mula tulis chapter 7. I hope to finish chapter 7 by Dec 26. Then, I will have until the new year to edit, update references and etc. Mula tahun baru, I will have to concentrate on my essay which is due on 31st of jan as well as my presentation on 12 jan AND exam tak tahu berapa hari bulan. Dalam pada itu, ada juga plan untuk berjimba dgn bestfrenKT. woot woot. A well deserved break, I think. My sis pula may come in Feb and I am persuading her to agree to pergi bercuti di Istanbul. hih hih.

Oklah. bila pikir pasal holiday, rancak je kepala otak. Tapi bila pasal pelajaran..mak aii..lamabt sikit. tsk tsk.

Oklah. Esok ingat ye diri sendiri. Edit chapter 2 and tulis conclusion dan kalau boleh, start on chapter 3!! Come on come on.

sharing is caring #1

u ols!!!

mak rasa every saturday mak akan kelolakan ruangan sharing is caring, gittew!!!

Untuk kali pertama ni, meh mak sharing-is-caring-kan citer pasal masalah tumit kaki yang merekah.

kalau nak tahu, kaki mak kan memang kasar gittew kat bahagian tumit, nak-nak dalam cuaca sejuk-sejuk dingin nieh. Makanya, before this, mak memang dah try krim kaki scholl dan vaseline dan juga satu produk ni jenama douglas. Walaupun mak rajin letak everyday, perubahan tu tak nampak uols. Cuma vaseline tu je la kot ada ala-ala skit...yang lelain tu, nan hado!!!

Sonyer, one day, tetiba masuk kedai l'occitane lepas sesi berkopi di starbucks. Then, mula-mula ingat nak beli dia punya almond oil, konon nak gunakan at my feet lah kan. Tapi iols tanya juga kat SA tu, apa produk yang seswai untuk dry feet at cracked heels. Dia terus menghala ke arah suatu corner, dan bagi dekat mak one silver colour tube. Apekah???

Ia adalah dry skin foot cream with 15% shea butter. Mak pon beli la kan (I think it was 22euros) sambil berkata dalam hati, it better be worth the price I paid for!!! Tapi dalam hati juga macam tak la konfiden sangat that it will work.

And so, I tried it on every night and sometimes before going out. Kadang-kadang ada juga culas. But I tell you, I can so see the difference, even mak baru guna 2 weeks!!! My feet is soft!!!! I felt the difference even after only a week of usage. serius beb.

So, if you have masalah like me,silalah try l'occitane dry skin foot cream with 15% shea butter (150ml). Memanglah pricey sikit but it is worth it! Plus, I think that tube can last for quite a while.

Harini, iols pi beli pulak hand cream dia. I hope it will do its magic!!!

Getting there

Saya baru sahaja selesai proses me-rekonstruk chapter 5. :)

I thought of reconstructing my chapter 6 juga tapi while doing it decided that it is best if I stick to the one I have now. Maka, dengan ini, saya officially tinggal chapter 7 and that wee bit in chapter 1! unless i change my mind, again, somewhere in between

Esok, I am going to leave budak kecik at the baby sitter and will have a group discussion for a presentation. Ingat, sambil tu nak curi masa ke uni pi print chapters 1 to 6 and pinjam buku before the xmas hols. Then, I plan to re-edit the chapters and write out the wee bit for chapter 1.

I aim to start writing my conclusion by Saturday, inshaAllah. We can do this girls!!! *hi five oyis, nat, iezma and et*

btw, hnm dah start sale katanya!!! bila zara nak sale ek??

pressure

is it just me or memang the closer you are to the finish line, the more unsure you are of yourself?? *sigh*

anyway, i met my sv yesterday and i told him how i keep on rewriting my chapters because i was not sure of how to best present it. He assured me that it was normal. Then, we decided that once I finished writing everything, we will talk over it, and I can do the neccessary corrections. At this rate, I am not really sure when I will be submitting it. Tapi, jauh di sudut hati, I think its better to submit something good rather than buat rush2 and hantar yang biasa-biasa je, kan?? So yea...my aim is to finish writing everything, including my conclusion chapter by this month. I would love to be able to present to my sv the complete thesis during our next meeting.

Today, I felt too tired to even look at my thesis. haih. cemana nak habis ni? I tell you, my chapter five is almost almost done. Then, I think i want to refine my chapter 6 and start writing my conclusion chapter.

Apa pon, I must finish it before new years. Sebab come January, I would have to prepare for a presentation, one assignment and an exam. *yikes*

Anyway, one good news which came out from my meeting with SV was, he said he's going to make me his Malaysian partner!!!! He is in the midst of preparing a proposal for a collaboration with malaysia. He wants to set up a media lab or something like that, and he will take me in!!! woot woot.

I had class today, and the profesor is one of my favourite. Anyway, she actually told me that I could bring Aaron to class. hehe. Dia juga cakap to tell my SV that she wants to sit in my examination committee. *matila!!!!

Right now, all I want to do is to finish this thesis!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ya Allah, permudahkan urusanku, please.

I am soooooooooooooooo tired.

And rasa guilty hari ni sebab tak sentuh kerja. but im so tired. tomorrow is a brand new day and i shall finish bab 5 esok, inshaAllah.

confused again!

argghhh....

i am confused. I am already in the midst of reconstructing my chapters when I suddenly feel that maybe i should not reconstruct it and just let it be!! haiyaaa....

ok. pendapat uols amat dialu alukan!

in the first version, i divided my chapters (ni i citer pasal findings saja ye) according to the methods I utilised. My content analysis was conducted to mainly discuss about the notion of cultural imperialism through television text in times of modernity.

My focus group discussion pula is to find out how they construct meanings from what they watch. So I divided this chapter into a few sub topics which actually shows the flow in which how they construct meanings, with relations to their cultural identity.

So, tiba-tiba last week terbaca thesis orang lain and terus cuak kan??? LOL.

So, in the second version, I thought that I should chop the chapters up and mish mash everything to indicate the things i want to emphasise on. But, now, masa tengah buat ni, I find that it does not make sense!! hmm...or am i not making sense?

Sebab, if ikut my first version, I will discuss balik the findings from both methods in my concluding chapter. So, dalam conclusion ni nanti, i akan spell out the answer to my research question and also bagitahu what are my contributions.

Kalau ikut new version, konon-konon each chapter will cerita terus contribution ittew tapi bila i tulis tu, rasa macam tak best je. Macam tak de flow je rasa tau.

So, what will you do if you were in my shoes? Stick with the old version? Or go for the new one??

on the way

I am still in the midst of reconstructing my chapter five. *wipes sweat*

Today, for the first time ever, Dr Sunshine buat locum kat private hospy. We have been wishing for this for a long time. Getting this gig would hopefully mean more locums, and hopefully locum kat ot plak next. Why is this important? Because this is one of the ways for him to network. Nanti, bila dah jadi specialist, bolehlah, inshaAllah bukak klinik kat private juga. But locum today ni, dia kena tidur kar hospy tu. Macam on call la juga tapi since there is only one patient, he gets to rest. Esok, dia oncall plaks. haih.

Okla. I want to finish my chapter five by esok. So that I can start on chapter 6 and 7.

Tried to feed Aaron mashed bananas tadi, tapi dia tak nak la....i mixed it with milk. hm...takpela.esok pagi try bagi nestum pula. and I can have goreng pisang! hihi.

re-writing

And so I have decided to restructure my thesis so that it will illustrate my arguments better.

I am actually freaking out and at times I feel like its a crazy step to take but I think I need to do this in order to produce a good thesis. Tak kan la nak hentam keromo, just for the sake of finishing it, kan?

And so, I will begin writing (again!). I really really hope I will finish as I aimed. Aim, end of the year, inshaAllah. Lepas tu nak submit, tunggu review and apply for viva.

Ya Allah, permudahkanla urusanku. Please let Aaron behave and understand that I need to do my work.

orait...lets do this gang!

takut

today, while searching for journal articles for one of my assignments, i came across a phd theses online. I skimmed through it and suddenly, ai rasa TAKUT!!!!

ohmygawd!!!

kenapa takut? kenapa?

sebab, i rasa thesis yg ditulis oleh mamat ittew tersangatlah bombastik pengunaan wordsnya.

Takpe ke eh, if guna simple words sajer? Ishh..risaunyerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

PAstu, pasal pembahagian chapters. You see, I choose to divide my chapters according to its purpose. Contoh:

chapter 1: intro

chapter 2: malaysian society

chapter 3: theoretical framework

chapter 4. methods

chapter 5 findings

chapter 6 findings

chapter 7 conclusion

takpe ke ek? haiyaa...risaunyer!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sempoi sangat ke ek if divide chapter cenggitu? atau, yang penting adalah contribution kita to society? hmm...*garu kepala*

Anyway, I am planning to complete my chapter 1 esok tapi ada masalah kecik yang agak besar. Iaitu, masalah citation dimana ai telah cited an author, tapi kat my writing tu, ada year saje dan page number non ado. haiyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa *ketuk kepala*

I hope to start my chapter 7 by Friday, inshaAllah.

Anyway, tak pe ke ek tulis simple2 jer? Ke I jer rasa simple sebab dah spuloh juta kali baca. TSK. How niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii.......................

Lepastukan, tetiba rasa,cukup ke buku2 yang i baca. Of course it will never be cukup kan. Tapi pastu datang pula suara hati kata, if baca banyak2 pon, you cannot put everything in your disertation.

Kawan-kawan yang dalam boat yang sama *lambai-lambai to Oyis, Kayla, Eti, Iezma*, how are you people doing? Is this something usual to worry about? Is it? Is it?

selesai!

ok....i have finished writing my chapter 3. So uols, I only have my chapter 7 left and 1 small part of my chapter 1 (organisation of thesis punye subtopic).

Esok, I am going to print out my chapter 5 and chapter 3. Pastu, the next few days, I plan to edit and proofread the chapters (including chapter 6 yang dah print tapi tak edit lagi). Lepas tu, buat pembetulan di mana perlu.

Then, after i dah buat pembetulan, I plan to print everything out again...so that I can read it as a whole thesis. Then, corrections again and I plan to proceed writing my conclusion. I somehow think my conclusion chapter holds the important key to the whole of my thesis because it is in this chapter that i plan to carefully illustrate my contribution to knowledge. risau la jugak because I sometimes rasa tak confident if I can get my points across.

I am still wrecking my brain in thinking how to tie everything together. So hopefully, the process of editing and rereading every chapters accordingly will help me connect the dots and direct my thoughts. :)

I sound so geeky kan.

Alhamdullillah. I really really hope to finish by this month. Now, I rasa that I should not rush myself sangat. I am now thinking of using my winter holidays to re-edit, proof read, check formats and etc and submit it as soon as the semester reopens. I just want to make sure that everything is perfect, well, to me la at least kan.

Tapi, if ada rezeki for me to habis cepat this writing, I would be really really grateful.

Ok tu jer.

Other than going to uni to print out the chapters esok, I plan to rest! and maybe go to a bazaar. tengoklah cemana. :)

Alhamdullillah.

kali pertama dalam 31 tahun!!

today, i changed my first ever light bulb. i know,mungkin uols dah biasa buat tapi this is my first time and i thought i should put it in writing.

if kat rumah, sure i lembik dan akan minta dr Sunshine yang tukarkan when he gets back from work. LOL.

tapi dah duduk sendiri ni, terpaksala kan. Last time when the lights in my room blew, i had to panggil orang lain to tukarkan cos i was heavily pregnant and tak berani nak panjat2 kerusi precariously to change it.

Tapi kali ini, i beranikan diri (altho there is the fear that I will fall sampai ingat maybe i should call my friend first in case anything happen to me, ada la orang tahu kan...wakakak...tapi i tak call pon) and stood at the tip of the chair to change my light bulb. dah la vertically challenged..LOL.

anyway, cannot wait to be my lembik self kat Malaysia nanti. LOL. I miss my husband.

tak ada mood

i brought aaron for his check up today. At 11 days shy of being 6 months, he is 6.77kg and 65cm. I think he is a tall baby because I dukung pon, kaki dia dah melonjong. His length is definitly longer than my torso. Lepas check up tu, nak beratur untuk buat next appointment tu, mengambil masa yang agak lama. I tell you, ada minah ni, siap kena reject lagi oleh klinik ittew sebab i think they are not taking in new patients anymore. Anyhoo, lepas dapat appointment baru, kena la bagi susu. Maka, by the time I left the clinic, it was close to 11. Sempat singgah buat groceries sikit and terus balik to reach home about 12.30. By the time sampai rumah, mood adalah sudah ke laut. uwaaaaaaaaaa

Jauh di sudut hati, memang ada perasaan risau ya amatz like sempatke habis ni...

tapi ada juga kata2 slow and steady wins the race (ni pinjam dari bob the builder).

So here I am, malam2 ni, trying to write because i am worried. huhu.

oklah. saja nak luahkan perasaan.

my bestfren is coming to visit me. woot woot. cannot wait. then we plan to go to venice. :)

Syukur

Alhamdullillah, all my files could be recovered!!!! Syukur sangat-sangat ya Allah. How did I do it?

I went to vienna-expat forum and searched for computer and ada this one guy recommended a person who can fix computers. I went to that guys website and tgk a youtube video he uploaded in which he salvaged a usb stick dan the files in it. Terus I felt like there is hope that my external hard drive could be saved!!! So, on Monday, I went to that guys place. Jauh juga tempat tu, but I managed to find it. Dia kata, he will try his best to fix it, dan kos maxima mungkin adalah 70euro. I pon ok ajelah....

Lepas tu, I felt like treating myself to some hot choc and cake. Masa tengah minum2 hot choc tu, dapat text cakap dah siap baiki!!! cepat ok the service. hihi.

Lagi satu, I bersyukur, anak2 ai dah baik demam. :)

Next...is, one of my paper has been accepted to be presented at a conference in Japan. I will be presenting vitually because conference is in April. So, inshaAllah, next year, akan ada 2 paper presented at international conference and dalam proceeding. :)

Tapi kan, tetap la i tak habis2 lagi tulis pasal modernity nieeee......*ketuk kepala sendiri*

you get what you give

Hari ini, saya tidak bangun untuk solat Subuh.

Dan tak tahulah sama ada kebetulan ke apa, hari ni adalah antara hari paling sh**y yang pernah saya alami.

1. Pergi buat groceries, namun tertinggal satu barang di kaunter and only realised it when i got home. Mak tak koser nak pi kedai tu balik, lagipon what proof do i have that I tertinggal barang ittew di kaunter.

2. My laptop dan juga komputer di universiti tak boleh read my external hard drive which contains my thesis!!!!!! And altho I have some backup (only a few chapters) the ones that I have corrected atau add info non ado back up. I wanted to do it today but alas...this thing happened! Call dr sunshine, tapi terasa seperti kena marah.:( Maka call kawan di sini and she said, maybe the cable that connects the external to lappie yang longgar. Emm..mungkinkah? LAgipon it did jatuh before i guna pagi tadi. Maka decided to go to Saturn to get a new cable.

3. On the way to Saturn to get a new cable to connect my external hard drive to the lappie, bus berenti jaaauuuuhh lagi dari stesen that i want to turun. Sebab apparently now, every Samstag leading up to xmas, bus will only stop till this particular station. Maka, terpaksa I menapak (sambil ber-babywearing cik Aaron yang agak berat ittew).

Now i am home (its almost 4pm) and baru nak makan breakfast/lunch. :(

Lepas makan ni, nak test if pertukaran cable berjaya menyelamatkan external ku. Doakan yek.

Ke uols yang expert2 computer tu camana i can rectify this matter????

pasal sms

Tahu tak, when i was pregnant with aaron last year, i text Dr Sunshine almost every single morning (time malaysia), just to say good morning ke, or drive safely ke or apa2 ajelah.

Pastukan, when I got back here with Aaron, I pulak yg dapat text almost every morning from him!!!!!! *tersengih lebar*

I tell you, waking up to find a text from my husband is one of the greatest feeling ever. It may seem so simple, but, it really makes my day! :)

Lagi-lagila bila dapat text ajak pergi holiday. Ooohhh...cannot wait for it to materialise.

Ok, sekarang, kena buat kerja. :)

mulut yang laju dari otak

ok. hari ni i rasa i buat sesuatu yang mungkin akan membinasakan diri sendiri.

you see, i tengok kawan-kawan i yang dah complete phd kan, cara sorang buat kerja adalah, tulis, sv cek, pastu depa buat corrections, sv recheck, pastu dah ok baru submit, betul?

So, I pon dengan innocentnya ingat its just like that over here. Maka tadi, bila sv tanya bila rasa-rasa nak hantar my completed thesis, i kata in december as I set a deadline for myself, which is dec 5th. yes.deadline ittew adalah tarikh di mana saya yakin akan siap ketujuh-tujuh bab sahaja. read. bab2 sahaja. bukan abstrak lah, acknowledgement, update references, dan segala bagai mak nenek ittew.

tapi, rupa-rupanya konsep kat sini (or maybe konsep sv i la kan) ialah bila sv kita examine thesis kita, dia tak baca draft2 sume tu. dia akan baca the binded copy tu terus utk examination. huaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa....so how?? so bila dia kata bila nak submit tu, maksudnya bila nak submir the binded copy. pepandai je kan i kata nak hantar in december.....

takpe.

this means i have to work extra super duper hard.

my plan of action adalah work my butt of and submit it before xmas hols. doakan i berjaya ye uols.

p/s: risaunya nak hantar kerja yang tidak diperiksa oleh sv. mujur butiran thesis tu, well, some of it, i dah guna dan diperkisa untuk a few assginments.

caiyok caiyok!! kata mak budak yang nak tengok amazing race dulu sebelum start buat kerja

almost there

Dear blog,

Hari ni, ai bertungkus lumus habiskan bab 6 yang sudah lama tergendala. Tahu tak betapa susahnya nak curahkan idea wahai blog? Dahlah tu, anakanda pulak hari ni a bit grumpy (prolly because i pepandai pi minum green tea and i think that made him gassy..logic ke my tanggapan wahai other breastfeeding moms?) and only wants me to hold him. I can letak him la sekejap-sekejap. Finally, sebab tak tahan, i just placed him on a pillow on my lap while i continue to type away, like masa sekarang ni. Atas lap, tido punyaaaa nyenyak!

Anyway, back to chapter 6. Yes. Selesai akhirnya. Tho baru habis tulis ajelah. Belum lagi baca dan edit semula. You knowlah kan bila baca dan edit tu...sekali overhaul. Whatever it is, I am just so super happy uols!

Dengan ini, saya ingin mengumumkan that I only have 1.5 more chapters to go!!! 0.5 adalah part modernity yang ai tak mula lagi tulis dan 1 tu adalah conclusion uols!!!!! I am so excited to be able to get this far dan bersyukur ke hadrat Illahi sebab memudahkan kerja ai. :) Tapi at the same time, kadang-kadang risau jugak if apa yang i tulis tu tidak menepati kriteria. NAmun begitu, kita buat yang terbaik kan. SV tu hanya akan baca bila dah complete.

So, esok ingat nak start retyping stuffs that I plan to use for my modernity piece. Kalau boleh, by Tuesday dah nak start writing. I am waaayyyyyy pass my deadline. Sepatutnya, I should have finished writing everything by 20.11 and start my proofreading and editing process. Tapi tak apalah kan. My new target date is 5 December, inshaAllah. Tolong doakan i berjaya ye uols? Kalau sempat siap by 5 December, boleh la minta SV tolong baca dan betulkan. Pastu can do corrections and then submit to sv again and then correct again dan kemudian submit for external review. I really hope that I can submit it before january ends, inshaAllah. I really envision myself going back at the end of March. But, I am not sure if I should still go back if tak dapat jawapan or result from reviewer ittew cos lepas tu nak kena arrange for viva plaks. hmm... Takpe, tu nanti kita pikir when the time comes.

Oh, and I have a piece of good news to share! My paper has been accepted for one of the conferences that I talked about, Alhamdullillah. Conference is at the end of March. Am itching to go actually, but tak surelah if feasable or not. huhu. If not, kita jadi virtual presenter sajalah ek.

Ok. ittew saje dari iols.

Esok ada some thingy happening at D's house. So I shall be going there. Balik tu I akan buat kerja.

Monday nak pi jumpa SV. Sebelum date ittew, I nak pi print out my chapter 6. Lepas meeting dgn sv i plan to lepak stabux and proofread my chapter. Having said that, I couldnt believe that my chapter 6 is supppeeerrrr panjang.

Oklah. ittew saje blog. Doakan kejayaan ai ek?

menarik!!!

one of the things that i have been doing these past few days ialah to browse the internet cari conference. And, I just found out that some conferences allows virtual presentations! How cool is that?

You see, I mmg terasa nak present paper buy my biggest worry ialah, siapa akan jaga Aaron during the duration of the conference. There is such a thing as flying nanny offered at my uni, in which a babysitter from the kinderbeuro will ikut kita ke conference tu and help care for our child tapi keringlah poket ai if nk kena bayar fir their flight, food, accomodation n child care charges kan? That sort of stopped me from sending out abstracts n etc.

Tapi, dengan konsep virtual presentation ni, ai tak payah risau pasal siapa nak jaga anak n also the flight tix and accomodation. Its much much easier on my pocket and you are still considered as a presenter walaupun tak de kat sana in real life. :)

So far, I came across two conferences which i am interested in yang offer virtual presentation. So what would a virtual presentation be like? Well, satu tu, dia suruh kita record our presentation and upload it in a specific channel on youtube. Satu lagi tu, kita kena submit poster and if ppl are interested in our paper atau research, they can email to ask the questions.

Best kan??

Ok...I better start writing my abstracts.

p.s: lepastu, nak look at my chapter 6 yg dah seminggu diabaikan. but on the bright side, i finished my book review!! i plan to submit it to a journal as well, inshaAllah. :)

habislah

i was not productive at all last week. I did not even bother to touch my thesis atau apa-apa yang berkaitan dengannya.

tapi semalam, selepas kena 'sound' dengan Dr Sunshine, barulah nak start baca buku that I have to review (and kena submit the review by Nov 29th). There's 12 chapters, and I baru nak masuk chapter 7. uwaaaa.....nasib baik buku tu ada kaitan dengan a paper I have to write and also my research. Alahai...whylah so malas sekarang ni??

Tapi...dalam malas-malas tu, I ada juga rajin sikit. Rajin apa tau? Rajin browse online for things that I nak bawa balik. aiyoo..tak sedar diri betul i ini kan? Kerja tak buat, tapi dah berangan nak balik. howlah???

Dr Sunshine and I agreed that tak payah beli electrical items. I am planning to bring back pinggan mangkuk, periuk belanga and other knick knacks...maybe like baking pans and etc. itu sajalah barang2 household yang akan dicari dan sedang dicari pon sekarang ni. hehe.

I feel like going to UKlah untuk beli all those tea towels yang kiut-kiut dan benda seangkatan dengannya. Namun demikian, harapan ittew mungkin tidak feasable. *nangis*

oklah...nak sambung surf internet lagi..heheh...

tourist guide

hari ni, i jadi trousit guide for a very very very important guest!

you see, my biggest boss ever ever univc is in town for a meeting or something like that and she brought her dotter-in-law and cucu (sangat lucky ok d.i.l dia dapat m.i.l macam dia!!! she gets to follow her to alot of places on 1st class lagi tuu...ok la..i think its 1st class because that was what i saw at the stroller tag. hehe. hotel memang confirm lah 5star!).

anyway, since she has a meeting, saya telah dipertanggungjawabkan untuk bawa d.i.l sightseeing. oh emm gee. the dil mmg sgt baik and best ok. And, what amazes me was she is of mix parentage (european +melayu) and lives overseas most of her life, tapi dia so comfortable cakap melayu. in fact, dia cakap macam kita je. manglish with a lil bit of french. and, sungguhpun i can see that they have a lifestyle that I don't have (pra.da diaper bag, d&g baby romper, lacoste baby shoes), depa sangaaattttt lah modest! i like. who would have thought kan?

tidak perlu dikatakan, saya memang sangat amat amat nervous bila around the biggest boss ever ever and the 2nd big boss (sampai makan pon control uols!!!). tapi depa baik sebenarnya. i particularly like the 2nd big boss. sangat baik. dan bagi tips2 pasal how to get fundings for research and etc!!

needless to say, i plan to keep in touch, especially with 2nd big boss who was very kind n bahasakan herself as nenek to aaron.

esok i plan to have coffee with d.i.l. friday mb nk jumpa jap cos ingat nak pass some chocs and & local cakes which i loooovvveeee. :)

yg penting juga, saya tak sentuh pon kerja2 phd saya!! deadline dah lari ke laut. tsk.

yg penting, my biggest boss and 2nd big boss main cak cak dgn aaron. uols ado?

my wedding playlist

I found my wedding playlist while reading through my old blog!!! I have been looking for the playlist for ages. I compiled the list sebab masa tu my bridesmaid nana ditugaskan untuk cari lagu-lagu tu dan burn kat cd supaya masa reception boleh main lagu-lagu ittew!!!

all the songs have special meanings to me and actually reminded me of the times that i spend with my friends, my bf. Semua lagu tu memang ada kenangan. anyway, here's the list....

Mel C's never be the same again: I have always always felt that it was our song. That song came out when we just started dating and its about friends who became lovers. jadi sangat seswai ok untuk jadi lagu tema! (altho haku je la kan rasa macam tu...wakakakak)

You''re still the one by Shania Twain: Lagu ni, reminds me of gang projek yang always there for me, especially during my difficult phase ittew. They supported me all the way! An also because my kisah percintaan penuh ranjau berduri (chewah) and the relationship had to go through one of the most horriblest (if there is such a word) phase. Tapi, I thank god that afz was strong and had confidence in us and pulled me back up. :)

Jangan bersedih lagi, Anuar Zain: Lagu that I used to cry to in the car on the way to work, on the way back from work, or any time i felt like it during the difficult phase of our relationship. Memang kena ok lagu ni dgn iols!!

All my life, K-ci and Jojo: I always consider this my song with my KT girls, my best friends since standard 1. Thank you for being my sisters. *teary eyed*

Because you love me, Celine Dion: afz pernah nyanyi lagu ni for me masa kitaorang dating dekat the weld. (ohemgee, my memory is so kuat okeh..wakakak...another song that he used to sing for me was a better man by robbie williams)

Percayalah, ct nurhaliza: lagu ni selalu pasang masa lepak main that ball game on wani's pc, while waiting to buka or nak pergi dinner. lagu ini juga selalu berkumandang semasa saya rindu gila kat afz yang semasa itu belajar di kelate (padahal every 3 weeks kot jumpa..wakakakak)

swear it again, westlife: lagu ni, reminded me of my first year. masa dgn gang bib. mek. mesyuarat tangga. masa frust dapat tahu adam is dating someone else. tapi tak lah frust sangat pon uols...mak ada bf lain shorlt after that. wakakakak...

manisnya senyumanmu, elite: lagu bila mak karoks dgn gang2 bib. also lagu masa intai ali. wakakkaak...oh..i miss my old roomate, sue and bib.. ingat tak masa kita intai2 ala.....haih..the stuffs kita buat masa 1st year. heheheh

thank god i found you,mariah carey: lagu yang i perasan is lagu i dgn afz. wakkakaka..tapi honestly, thank god he 'saw' me. memang la i found him, tapi if dia tak sedar kewujudan mak nothing will happen, right? hehehe

This I promise you, N Sync: lagu masa rindu2...wakakak..dan juga reminds me of tet. Tet, if ko baca ni, ingat tak lagu ni tet? ingat tak kita suka nyanyi lagu ni kuat2? Lagi satu, kita suka nyanyi lagu bsb dalam toilet. lagu apa ek? haa..from the first daaaayyy...that I saw ur lovely faceeee...honey i knew that we will be..together forever......

I turn to you, Christina aguilera: lagu masa 2nd year...reminds me of the days i used to squating kat bilik wan cin. then lpepak bilik yani kecik and wan rose. then i moved to my own room..hehehe

Gadisku, Search: reminds me of ieja. and..reminds me of my guy friends, ejam, mucher, wark, arwah pau...they made this tape for me and sang this song...i will never forget it!

so in love, all-4-1: sri aman daysss....yc, my, mh, aw, mt, mm. i miss uols.

mencintaimu, Kris D: entah kenapa, this song ada dalam list i. hmm..maybe sebab ni lagu kawen kot...wakakakak

Sunshine, gabrielle: gang lepak sampai subuh, iaitu wan cin, wan rose, grunge, najeeb, norman, di feringghi...lagu ni mmg buat aku ingat kat korang....lagu thong song pon ingatkan aku kat korang jugak..wakakakak..

flying without wings, westlife: lagu ni, afz slalu juga nanyi...this song reminds me of him.

because of you, 98 degrees: ni lagu dgn nana....and also ingat zaman kmk..heheheh...

So, whats your lagu???

my fourth raya haji!

Cannot believe that this will be my fourth raya haji.

This will be the 2nd raya haji semasa buat phd that i have a family member with me. Last time, it was my darling Andi. Now, its Aaron's turn to teman mama.

Anyway, kami ingin mengucapkan selamat hari taya haji kepada semua, di mana jua anda berada. Dengan ucapan, ingat-ingatla kat kitaorang time-time makan sedap-sedap tu!

Mwah.

p/s: Aaron finally turned over today!!! Way to go Aaron. Next, mengesot and duduk and punggah almari baju

sweet ke sedih?

i think Andi misses me.

Tahu tak kenapa I cakap macam tu?

Cos while skyping tadi, he was kissing the computer screen endlessly. Sebab dia ingat dia cium mama dia and adik dia.

*cries*

renew resident permit

haih. i tell you. i selalu bermasalah lah bila bab renew residence permit ni. tapi sebenarnya i rasa yang membuat masalh ni ialah the particular office which services my district. sebab apa tau. my other friends yang kena pergi ofc at district lain, ok aje. easy peasy je bila nak renew permit ittew.

terbaru, i kena pergi ke kreditsverschutzband office plak dah!!!! i tak pi lagi, but i guess tujuan ke ofc tu untuk mintak statement yg i tak akan bankrap anytime soon, i guess. haih., perluke? i ni, hutang pon non ado ok. penat tau nak kena ke sana ke mari mengendong anakanda ku.

petang ni, i plan to pergi settlekan everything. then,esok pagi boleh pi submit all the documents ke visa office ittew dan tunggu ajer for them to call me cakap visa siap.

minta-mintalah semuanya dipermudahkan.

needless to say, saya berasa letih and by the time i get homei have no mood to look at my beloved chapter 6. huhu. tapi i really must must must do it lah!

apa yg tinggal utk chapter 6?

-finish up intro

- kemaskan my analysis on rural areas

- discussion

- conclusion.

i think today i kena, by hook or by crook, finish up the analysis on rural area so that esok boleh concentrate on doing the discussion. lepas siap, bolehlah habiskan intro and buat conclusion.

Ya Allah. permudahkanlah urusan ku.

p/s: lepas ni kena start reading the book for my book review pulak. *letih*

when the going gets tough...the tough gets going

hrmm...am still working on my chapter 6. At the same time, I have this book review thingy which I would have to submit. blearghh...

anyway, i was talking to dr sunshine yesterday he told me of his plans for the future.

Lepas dah buat masters, kena posting somewhere outside the Klang Valley and he is actually thinking of applying to somewhere in the Borneo. Lepas two or three years in the borneo, nak apply buat subspecialty pulak. nanti 3rd year of sub, he will have the option to be attached to a hospital abroad for 6 to 9 months. lepas tu, balik semula and hopefully dapatlah kerja somewhere dekat2 rumah.

Ok. the question is. Where do I fit into all this??

Haih. no 1. Mak tak rela dia pergi ke Sabah or Sarawak without me! no way jose dia pergi sorang-sorang ok. *matilah posesive* So, adakah i kena cuti tanpa gaji? Or, is there any way that I can request to be seconded to one of the unis there?

No 2, masa pi overseas tu nanti. How? Ok..tu mungkin I boleh request untuk sabatical kan. So, tak la berapa risau sangat.

hmmm.....honestly, I thought that nanti I dah balik next March (yeszaa...harus visualize ye yang saya akan balik in March), tak de dah la episode duduk berjauhan dari suami dan anak-anak. Apa pon, I can only pray and hope for the best, kan?

Ok..back to my chapter 6.

bab 6

i am going through the malas phase right not and it definitely does not help when i only have till nov 5th to finish my chapter 6. tsk. so last night, kuatkan la juga semangat untuk membuat sesuatu padahal sebab dah out of tv series to watch. I still have a long way to go and I keep on thinking on how to best present my analysis. Inilah penangan phd ek? tengah mandi fikir, tengah masak fikir, before tido fikir. haha...

what else? semalam konsert dani. thank god one of bestfriend's anak goes to the same school. So like last year, they ol took a video of dani. hehe. :) Pastu, nak cerita. Andi also went to the concert. Dr Sunshine tanya Andi: Nanti Andi concert Andi nak nyanyi lagu apa?

Andi: Bila ecok (the Nora Elena theme song yang bila esok tu)

Dr Sunshine: Pastu lagu apa lagi?

Andi: Cing cing (that money money money song tu)

LOL.

Daylight savings has started to I technicallyhad an extra hour to sleep in today. Tapi anakanda I decided that I cant. hmph.

Orait, back to chapter 6. Going to D's house in a while to bake cookies and cuppies. Yumm!!!

janji pada diri sendiri

Today has been a long day.

First up, pasal chapter 5. Mati-mati ai ingat hari ni 25 october, the date i set for my deadline. Maka, semalam, bertungkus lumus cuba jugak habiskan tulis chapter tu. I almost finished, cuma tak sempat nak tulis conclusion. Seperti biasa, i only write my conclusion after i have proofread the stuff I wrote. Maka tadi pergi print dekat uni, dan ke starbucks bersama anakanda untuk sesi menyemak penulisan. The verdict? I have loads to correct and add. Hehe. Tapi tu la tujuan kita proofread, ye tak??

Next, pasal pengurusan phd ni. Well, since theyols baru aje introduce the new phd system kat sini (well, the year i registered lah), banyak benda la nak kena buat. So, today, I submitted my updated agreement and an acknowledgment form. The person cakap, early december baru boleh dapat jawapannya. Hmmm...

Hari ni juga, i fotostat segala mak nenek yang belum difotostat untuk urusan visa. Lecehlah kat sini. Tiap2 tahun nak kena renew. Nak renew tu, siap nak check result exam bagai. Haih...nasib ai pass semua. Alhamdullilah.

Pastu, pergi pula ke klinik paeds. Patutnya boleh call je nak buat appointment but I have somehow misplaced the number. Mujur jugak pergi sebab masa bagitahu yang nak buat appointment untuk check up anakanda, dia kata depa dah full. Sini memang macam tu tau. Bukan depa kisah pon nak terima banyak-banyak patient. In a way its good lah kan, sebab kita tahu bila pi for appointment, tak de la nak tunggu lama sebab depa memilih patient. Anyway, bila orang tu kata dah full, i kata lah, i bukan nak appointment immedietly pon. Dia tetap juga kata full. Then I cakap, dulu anak i pon check up kat sini. Pastu, ni baby baru pon, of course la i bawa ke sini juga. Dia terus tanya nama anak, dan check kat system. Lepas tu, barula dia tanya, mana mutterkindpass (ala-ala buku merah kat mesia, tapi sini kaler kuning). Ai tunjuk la, proof yang masa pregnant, memang i check up kat sini. Barula dia cek kalender doktor, and tup tup, ada satu je lagi slot free jumaat ni. Syukur sangat sangat!!!! Dia kata, memang awak bernasib baik sangat-sangat. Ye, saya syukur sangat. Alhamdullilah. I guess Aaron nanti kena ambik dose for rotavirus kot friday ni. Yang pasti, i nak tahu berat dia berapa.

What else? I plan to do my corrections tonight. If I sempat habis by tomorrow, I nak beli the baking pans petang esok. hih hih.

Am going to Hungary on Wednesday. To a place dekat dgn border je. Pergi ke tempat mandi manda.

Ok...mak nak sambung buat kerja.

p.s: Am so happy to receive an email from sv yang kata thank you very very much. Hehe. kembang kuncup kejap. Well, at least dia tahu la kan yang I can buat kerja. Harap2 dia masukkan la kot nama I dalam research team dia. Hehe. Dan harap-harap dia akan consider pertolongan I ni semasa memberi markah untuk subjek yang i amik dgn dia. hehe.

ter-beli

tadi ai lunchie smunchie dengan D. Ai sebenarnya tak lah menyangka D ni nak berkawan dgn I sebab we ols punye situasi ni like enggang and pipit. So, ai agak segan juga actually bila keluar dengan dia sebab tak pasti dengan protokolnya. Apa pon, i am very thankful dia nak la ajak mak pi coffee and etc.

Anyhoo, lepas lunchie smunchie tu, we ols pergi jenjalan masuk keluar kedai. Lalu. ai dah terbeli (atas influence D, i tell you, I am so gullible!!), satu glass cake stand (yang boleh pusing2 tu,9.90euro) dan juga 6 pieces of ramekins (bolehlah nak buat pie bagai kan9.90euro).

Next dalam target pembelian adalah baking pans jenama kaiser and maybe tempat bawak kek yang ada tutup tu kan. Well, kaiser punye tu, mak tengok, dia baking pan tu, pastu comes with free tempat tutup thingy tu. Well, we shall see lah how.

And then, berjalan-jalan lagi, nampak pulak set sudu garpu WMF for 12 people hanya 99euros. Theres also another set, for 149euros, for 12 people as well, but this one ada serving spoons, ladles and also cake cutter thingy. Should I get it? It is in my things to buy list. Hmmm....

Also, sale kali ni, nak kena dah beli periuk belanga idaman tu uols! Yeszaa...i have to start mengumpul barang2 since tak lama lagi nak balik kan. Christmas nanti, nak lengkapkan set porcelain i. Pastu, should i beli villeroy and boch or not? And theres this Bosch coffee maker, selling for only 49euros now. Should I get it?

And yang penting. Prada dah ada outlet kat Pandorf. woot woot.

mengurus lawatan sv ke mesia

I tell you, ai ni geram la jugak kan dgn seorang bekas pelajar phd sv I, yang juga berasal dari negara tanah tumpah darahku, yang banyak menaburkan janji-janji palsu kepada sv i!

you see, that person came for his sabbatical, here, last year. Masa tu, sv i dok sibuk suruh dia arrange untuk satu meeting dengan uniputramesia. That person tu dari unimelaya. Anyhoo, that person pon cakap ok, i akan arrange dan menaburkan harapan palsu aje untuk sv i!!!! Alih-alih, dah setahun berlalu, lawatan tu pon macam tak jadi aja! So, kata-kata that person ala-ala hot hot chicken sh*t la kan.

So, last Monday, I met my SV to get his signature and also update him a bit on my progress. Belum sempat pon I nak start cerita pasal diri i, dia dah start pot pet pot pet pasal that person yang kononnya nak tolong dia tapi TAK buat apa-apa. Tambahan pula, dia memang frustlah sebab dia akan ke Bangkok in NOv so ingat nak stop over Msia since dah dekat kan. Maka, he asked me if I can help him. And that, I did.

Mak skarang sibuk ok dok berbalas-balas email dengan uni kat sana nak arrange visit ni. Dahla bukan ai punye uni tapi sebab sv punya pasal, i pasrah aje!! I was hoping that sv can visit my uni as well, in which he agreed, but sedihnya, orang uni i pulak tak free. *sigh*

Harap-harap lawatan sv ni fruitful lah ye. Dalam pada masa itu, i try to see the silver lining. Dan dalam kes ini, I think, the silver lining is, SV tahu I seorang yang boleh diharap untuk membuat kerja. kan? kan? hehe..nak jugak sedapkan hati.

Oklah. itu saja luahan perasaan.

Satgi mak nak pi lunch. Aiyo..matila lunchie smunchie dengan orang berpangkat uols. Harap-harap mak tak terkelu lidah or something.

kawan baru?

uols, tadi mak dapat fon call ajak mak pi lunch this thursday. mungkinkah this a start to a new friendship? Orang ni la yang banyak bagi baju2 kat anak mak, uols. Mak terima aje sebab baju2 tu cantik2 lagi dan amat jarang dipakai oleh anak dia.

honestly, i look forward to making more friends. just now, in the tram, i bumped into benoit's mom.Benoit was in nursery with Andi dulu. She invited me to her house. :)

Anyway, maybe I should ajak her for coffee one of these days.

hari ni,i ada date dengan sv. Harap2 date kami fruitful lah ye.

Anyway, I have already decided on my new deadlines. I only have about 9 days left to complete chapter 5. Yikes!! I have actually analyzed the programs kan, and wrote rough drafts of what I plan to write. Cuma nak menulis bebetul tu aje belum. I plan to start today sebab honestly, I just finished typing my rough drafts.

With the new deadline, I plan to complete everything by the end of Nov. I hope that it is feasable. Please Allah. Permudahkanlah urusanku.

mari kita freak out!

wahlauwei. Saya terkejut tadi apabila mendapat email dari my professor's assistant.

You see, sem ini, saya hanya ambil satu subjek sahaja. Tapi mak aii...preparation untuk subjek ittew agak banyak. On top of that, saya risau. Risau sebab ada dua kelas pada bulan 11, tapi bulan 11 tu lah babysitter I cuti balik Malaysia. How???????

Anyhoo, for the first meeting, we are supposed to select a book in which we would have to review (30%) yang katanya bertujuan untuk pursue for publication. We ols juga kena bawa 3 contoh book review dalam journal. Semua mak buat malam ni. Buku dah pilih. Journal tu tinggal nak print. Hari Isnin kena study sikit sebelum kelas.

Secondly, tajuk essay yang diberikan adalah agak mencabar. She gave 5 options but I choose to do this:

What are the possibilities for global interconnection among global audiences when

there are arguments that diasporas watch their own channels in the host countries?

What can we say about new forms of identity and resistance when discussing global

and transnational audiences?

Saya dah selesai exam. Next one will be in December. Paper that I have to submit tu pon, dah siap, Alhamdullillah. Erm, I thought of writing one more, to get extra credit kononnya, tapi I think I would just talk over it with my sv, who I will be meeting this Monday. *yikes!*

What else? Bermula esok, mak kena start writing uols! Yes, kena semangat! I must finish chapter 5 by hook or by crook. Semoga Allah permudahkan urusan, inshaAllah.

On an unrelated matter, I hairan sebab walaupun I memang fully bf anak i, cik P dah datang. Hrmm...baru je mengharap macam zaman Andi dulu in which dua tahun lebih (if campur dengan masa preggers) tak dapat. Oh well. Maybe its Allah's way to show that I am still fertile despite having only 1 ovary, kan? Syukur.

Pastu, I am invited for lunch tomorrow at the residence of our ambassadddddor. Mak nervous uols!!! Wife dia nak jumpa my baby. Tapi the wife is nice. I got a whole load of nice bajus yang hardly used for my Aaron. Kalau nak harap mak beli sendiri, tak la kot. hih hih.

Okie dokie.

bahasa ibunda

Last saturday, ada makan-makan at rumah one lady ni. Kat sana,I met this lady who has lived here for almost 30years. She has a 24 year old daughter yang hardly ever balik Malaysia. They ols balik Malaysia maybe once in five years or something like that.

Anyhoo, one would think that the kids (that lady has 2, one boy and one girl) sure tak reti cakap Melayu. Or, if cakap Melayu pon pelat-pelat or ada slang Austria, kan?? Ya Rabbi, I was so suprised that the kids, (yang muka memang mcm mat salleh) fasih berbahasa ibunda uols!!!!! Siap cakap "depa" lagi (becos the mama orang perak!). And she can campur cakap BM and BI in one sentence as well, like a typical Malaysian.

I was so proud of her. Yelah, walaupun jarang-jarang sekali balik kampung mak dia, and living in a place where people mostly speak Deutsch, she can cakap Melayu really well.

Whats the secret? Well, Mak dia memang usually converse in Deutsch with the kids but she also makes a point to speak to them in Malay. I think it is important to make sure our kids know how to speak Malay. Sungguh pon we brought them up overseas (tak kisah lah France ke, German ke, UK ke) that does not mean that they have to adapt to the locals punya language sahaja. We should encourage them to speak in their mother tounge. Yang I notice, Malaysians and especially Malays are particularly proud if their kids can converse in English or other European languages. Well, there's nothing wrong in that, because I try to teach my kids Deutsch as well. Cuma yang ralatnya, bila they just concentrate on English sahaja dan lupakan Bahasa Melayu. Sayang betul.

After all, Bahasa Jiwa Bangsa, kan?

hilang passport!

oh em gee.

saya adalah amat careless!!!!!

hari ni, saya ke universiti untuk meng-fotokopi a few documents untuk application meldenzettel,krankenkasse and permit untuk aaron. Sambil2 tu, saya juga mengfotokopi passport saya sebab nak renew reseidence permit.

anyhoo, setelah fotostat semua, saya pergi atas pulak ke computer lab untuk print out borang2 berkenaan.

then, pi beli lunch (lamb tikka sandwich), beli barang sikit kat billa, and then baru balik.

Balik tu, ai switch on lappie, ate my sandwich, relax-relax. Lepas tu, barulah terasa nak sort out documents yang i fotokopi tadi. Then, barulah realize yang passport i tak ada. Terus mak panik uolsss!!!!

Secepat kilat mak dress up and dress aaron up dan berdesup keluar ke tempat fotokopi tadi sambil mulut terkumat-kamit doa mintak-mintaklah kedai fotostat tu bukak lagi and passport i ada.

Dalam hujan renyai-renyai tu, I berjalan dengan laju pergi kedai ittew. Tanya kat mak cik jaga kaunter, u ols boleh cakap english tak? dia kata ye. pastu ai tanya, ada tak uols jumpa passport i? i fotostat pagi tadi dan i rasa tertinggal. Dia tanya, apa surname awak?

Lantas, dia ke rak buku belakang, dan ambik sesuatu.

Oh, passport saya selamat di tangan dia.

Terima kasihlah kepada pengguna mesin fotokopi yg menjumpai passport saya dan memberikannya kepada tuan kedai.

Syukur, Alhamdullillah.

ku kembali

teringat lagu cheerleader kat skolah dulu:

aku kembali dengan tabah hati

kembali lagi untuk memenangi

nombor satu

kami tuju

untuk sampai kemuncak

itulah ku tuju

anyhoo, its exactly a week since i got back!

I have sat for an exam. I have one more exam to sit for this wednesday and another one somewhere in December.

I also have to write a paper in order to get a grade for one of the subjects I took. Needless to say, haprak pon tak tulih lagi. But, I am planning to take bits and pieces of my thesis untuk dijadikan paper ittew. ok tak strategi? hehe.

I have three and a half more chapters to write for my thesis. Taaakkk jugak start2 tulis. Enjin belum panas lagi. Plus, I am still trying to settle hal-hal document si Aaron ni hah.

So, things to do:

1. Print appendix and attachment form to be signed by SV

2. Photocopy Aaron's passport and birth cert and its translation for meldenzettel, insurance and residence permit purposes.

3. Study for exam (only 2 days away. yikes!)

4. Write two papers

5. Write chapter 5.

Ok, hari ni memang dah plan nak print form dan juga pi fotostat bendalah semua. Selain ittew, nak tak nak, mak kena study lah kan. Tapi interesting thing about this paper is that, dia tak nak kita muntahkan semula facts (or rather theories) that we learned in class. Instead, the lecturer wants me to think of a theme, and how would I apply the teory according to the theme I choose dalam mereka research questions, methodology and etc. So, strategi i adalah to study my chapter one (introduction) and try to fit the theories somewhere. hmm..wajarkah thinking session ini dibuat di Starbucks bersama sidekick i??

Anyhoo, I have a trip to Muchen planned for early November. So, I must finish my chapter 5 before then. I give myself until the end of November to finish writing everything, inshaAllah. But of course, this all depends on the workload of the course I am taking this sem, which I think is pretty interesting and bonus point is, its in English. :)

Oklah, sidekick tengah tidur. I should shower. Then, can keluar pi print2 dan fotostat, and maybe pi shopping sikit. hih hih.

pasal rumah

haa...ni nak cerita pasal rumah.

homaigawd. i tell you, macam2 perubahan berlaku dalam proses nak renovate rumah. harap2 contractor tak akan charge over2 la kan. hihi.

so far, the belakang rumah has been extended. tiles dah pasang. bumbung dah naik. tinggal nak cat saje tapi Dr Sunshine masih memikirkan warna yang sesuai.

As for my kitchen, u see, my wet kitchen is pretty small, around 7x9ft saje. muat2 untuk countertop L shape. tapi tak dapat banyak work space on the counter sebab counter top size kecik sikit dan bila tambah sink (i got my dream sink!!!) and stove (belum beli tapi bila kira untuk space tu, i guna kiraan stove idaman..hikhik). Mula-mula, tak de pon hajat nak buat table top tu, tapi last last Dr Sunshine kata, buat ajelah. Since last minute, kitaorang dok survey2 tiles, and if you must know, only made the decision and bought it on the day I was about to leave KL.

The maids room which was attached to the wet kitchen tu, telah ditukan function as a pantry. Maka, the walls to the room has been knocked down and my small wet kitchen suddenly looks quite promising. hehe.

dry kitchen is now known as the dining room.

we also decided not to do any plaster ceiling because our ceiling mmg nice and smooth je. Maka, kami pasang cornice sajo. Savelah sedikit duit kat situ.

Grill pon dah tempah, tunggu nak pasang je. Patut pasang last Monday, tapi tak de pasang pon.

We ordered curtains for the living room downstairs. Mak aii...mahalnya curtains!!!! Tula, rumah banyak tingkap kan. hmmm....Maknanya curtains memang wajib buat secara berperingkat.

We also bought some lights and kipas. There's this really really cheap kedai lampu at Puchong. Nama dia Houses Lighting. Memang murah dan berbaloi-baloi. Ada satu lampu ni, I bought it with bulbs for rm97, dekat Nilai jual sebijik lampu tu, 258!!!! So, siapa nak beli lampu, sila pergi Houses Lighting. Even kipas pon murah berbanding dengan kedai lain. Kalau pergi kedai tu masa weekend, bersedialah untuk menghadapi suasana ala-ala pasar malam sebab memang ramaiiiii betul orang. Lagi senang pergi masa weekday, tenang dan damai sikit. Cuma, dorang tutup hari Isnin. Lampu tak beli lagi untuk semua bilik, just for some rooms and the kitchen. But at least now, when Dr Sunshine pergi visit rumah tak de lah bermandi peluh sebab dah pasang kipas in living room. hih hih.

Haih...best betul tengok rumah dah ada progress. Cannot wait to see pictures of it. La ni, nak tunggu depa siapkan dapur, and pasang cornice, and grill. Pastu, kena rehat kejap sebab duit tabung dah kering. hikhik.

Apakah next project?

I think its the kitchen cabinet, electrical appliances, water heating system.

Banyak betul guna duit bila nak masuk rumah ni. Mujurlah, nak masuk tahun depan. Adala sikit masa untuk kumpul duit for the next phase of this house projects.

Nanti bila mak dapat gambar, mak paste sini yek.

:)

kembali bersiaran

i was on a loonnnggggg hiatus kan. But I am back.

I hate goodbyes!

Last night, Dr Sunshine left the boys with my mom. When he said goodbye, Andi tanya, "Kita tunggu mama kat sini ye papa?"

And today, when they got home with Papa, Andi was looking for me. He thought I was waiting at home for them, like I sometimes do. Then dia tanya Papa, mama mana. Papa cakap kat Vienna. Then he said, tak balik-balik lagi? Lama betul mama kerja. tsk.

I miss my boys!!!!!

toilet training

hrmm...kerja doesn't seem to be moving. Well, to be honest it ain't easy!!! I am dead worried actually. So far right now, baru siap chapter 2, 4, and three quarters of chapter 1. chapter 3, half done. 5,6 dan 7, tak tulis lagi!!!! matilaaa....sempat ke ni nak submit by december???? *risau*

I am also thinking of asking someone to be a regular babysitter for aaron. tapi idak pulak i tertanya kan. Its a guy actually, but dia ikut wife dia kerja kat wien. i don't know if he'll be up to it. i will pay him of course. tapi tula...tak tahula dia nak ke idak....

ok..berbalik kepada topik diatas. I have actually started to toilet train AA. MAsa first day, it was tough. I spend so much time and energy mencuci duvet, bedsheet, carpet, countless shorts and pants!!! Tapi second day, ada 1 accident je. :) Even today, day three, only one accident. Tapi minor je because macam basah sikit aje kat seluar. Macam terkucil. But dia tahan. then bawa dia pi toilet baru dia wee wee properly. However, malam2 we still put his diaper on. Nak wait for no accidents during the day baru boleh be sure that he can control his bladder. apa pon, I am thankful. Because this means we only use 1 diaper a day. Imagine how much I can jimat!!! :)

Tapi my boy demam ni...even demam pon, we didnt put his toilet training on hold. Takut if berenti, nanti back to square one and have to start all over again.

OKlah..I am supposed to edit my chapter 1, tapi adakah i buat??? NOOO....i should really kick myself i tell you! Doakan I sempat habis my first draft by October....please please please...

Oh ya...disamping itu, kena start study la pulak kan! I have 3 exams in october. *pengsan*

bagaimanakah?

i have made some progress with my writing, Alhamdullillah. Tapi, tetaplah lari deadline.

Tapi, ai tak mo la stress sangat (walaupun hakikatnya i keep waking up in the middle of the night sebab memikirkan tesis nieh).

I am currently working on my chapter one. Chapter 2 and 4 dah settle. Chapter 1, almost there. Chapter three, halfway one.

Ya Allah, permudahkanlah urusanku. I really hope I'd be able to at least finish my data analysis before i fly back, inshaAllah.

*risau*

only in kmk

when i was 18, i was shipped of to a godforsaken place (at least that was what I thought lah masa tu) to do my matriculation. I cried buckets before leaving. My attempts to request for a transfer from my Daddy was to no avail. Nak tak nak, terpaksalah ai berkampung kat Kulim for 8 months.

Being schooled at sekolah biasa, I didn't know what to expect. The only thing that made me happy was the fact that my bestfriend will be there as well. So, tak de la lonely sangat kan. And as she was also from the same school that I was in, adalah gang kan. ihiks.

Maka, berbekalkan bag besar termasuk bantal peluk dan ration macam orang yang terperangkap dalam rumah sebulan, i made my way to the place. I was, indeed, very out of place. Everybody knew that my bestie and i were 'budak bandar' because of how different we were. We didnt blend in, at first. Yelah...orang pesan turun solat subuh, we ols, dah start kuliah subuh baru turun. Mana la tahu kena turun before azan!!! hih hih. My first week there, I dah crave for mcDs. haha. mengada betul.

Anyway, when I was there i learnt a lot of stuff.

1. i learnt how a good friend can betray you just because of a guy

2. i learnt how devastating it was to get my heart broken

3. how it felt to be cheated

4. how to 'lompat pagar'.

5. how to survive eating food from dewan makan

6. that a good friend would wake up and make you tea for sahur despite the fact that she does not eat sahur. *i love you tet*

7. it was also my first time makan nasi goreng daging merah!!!

8. how to escape dari dipatuk itik kampung. hihi

10. how to defend a friend's honour

11. that dreams do come true

12. bercinta masa 18 years old doesnt mean that you'd end up marrying that guy.

13. minat-minat dari jauh can end up in a happy marriage. :p

14. how to basuh baju guna tangan.

15. the trick to dapat the shower stall pagi2 is ironically to bangun lambat. tak yah rebut because everybody else seem to bangun awal. but then, bila bangun lambat, there's a possibility to miss breakfast at the dewan makan which was no big issue sebab tak de la sedap sgt pon. hihi.

16. being good in english gets you free burgers and abc

those were some of the stuff. gosh. i miss my young carefree days.

40 hari

At 40 days, Aaron:

- kadang-kadang tak tido after susu. Dia mahu di dodoi to sleep

- loves to be cuddled

- can coo and gurgle.

- sleeps sooooo well in his playpen but not so well in his cot

- prefers to sleep on his chest rather on his back

- muak susu lots of times but i think andi dulu lagi banyak

- recognizes mama (or bau mama) cos he'll stop crying when i carry him. bila papa angkat, kadang2 still menangis.

As for me, its been a tiring, whilrwind journey, being a mom of 3 boys. Penat okeh!!!! Especially when my no 1 dah pandai nak menjawab and my no 2 is in his terrible 2 phase. *lap peluh*

But, good news is i have gotten used to the routine. So now technically is the time when I should be doing my work (but of course I tend to procastinate and blog instead!)

Oklah...got to go blog hopping get back to work.

kerja kerja kerja

I baru je placed an order for a book through bookdepository sebab depa buat free delivery worldwide. That book is something i need to read before writing about modernity. So, since buku tu, next week kot baru sampai, maka ai put on hold dulu projek tulis pasal modernity. I will start writing on cultural identity plaks.

I tell you, speaking about modernity, rasa macam lagi banyak baca, lagilaaa banyak haku tak tahu. Tapi kan, actually it applies tu everything i have read so far. Hehe.

Cultural identity ni, sebenarnye ai dah baca and dah buat short notes pon. Just nak tunggu start menulis aje. masalah problem skarang, ai tak ingat mana ai letak my external hard drive. tsk. So, kena proses mencari dulu. To start proses mencari, have to wait for Mr Aaron to tidur.

Ok...nk tidurkan aaron sambil2 cari artikel on modernity.

oh mengapa?

alahai..target baca 2 chapter semalam tapi sempat baca satu aje. And, tak de pon cari article. tsk tsk. takpe. hari ni try perabiskan everything and malam nanti cari article plaks.

anyhoo, can i just say, that i love it when u kiss me all over my face before you go to work?? emm..camni rupanya perasaan jadi SAHM. I guess husbands tend to appreciate you more, no???

p/s: ayang, mak pon nak join uols tulis buku pasal phd mommies.

when push comes to shove

bagi yang membaca my previous post, sure tahu that i am supposed to have finished writing my theoretical framework chapter by now. Tetapi,adekah? Non ado!!!!! tsk. But I have made some progress in reading about modernity cuma blom habis2 baca lagi. Selagi tak habis baca how to write? how???

Lepas tu, ai gatal pi email one of my prof's assistant, tanya ada ke apa2 assignment since i missed the last few classes. Dia kata, kena tulis 15 page paper on our research project and include things that had been discussed in class. Coincidentally, one of the things discussed in class about my research was to include the theory on modernity in my thesis. So folks, looks like I really have to work my butt off to siapkan pasal modernity thingy ni. In a way, its a blessing in disguise, no? Sebab bila dah memang kena hantar untuk dapat grade, sure automatically akan try produce the best, kan?

So, today, my aim is to finish reading at least 2 more chapters, then I have one more to go. Malam ni ingat nak search for articles yang ada sentuh pasal modernity ni. Tapi kan, modernity ni macam related sangat-sangat to globalisation so i might just have a hint of globlalisation in my thesis nanti.

Apa pon, data analysis tak tulis lagi. *mati!!!!* But, I have written to seperate papers on the datas I collected of which one tu I dah present kat conference. Cuma, the paper tu tak guna all my datas. So, I am not that worried la, because I sort of have an idea of how to actually write it.

Ni ha...theoretical framework tak siap-siap lagi apa kes????

Please Allah, gibe me ideas on things to write, let Aaron cooperate and senang tidur (dia tak mo tido skarang!!! tsk tsk) and give me strength to get through all this.

Ok...nak kena try tidorkan budak kecik, pastu mandi and start reading.

kabinet dapur

Dr Sunshine kata, hal-hal berkaitan kabinet dapur adalah within my jurisdiction. Tapi, mak kan konsep surrendered wife gittew. So bila nak buat keputusan tu, tetaplah depends on suami. Cuma ai akan bagitahu siap2 apa yang berkenan di hati.

So anyway, semalam, we went to Puchong (again!). Tahu tak, kat sana banyak gila kedai berkaitan barang-barang rumah ni!!! We went to this row of shop lots (bagi sesiapa yang tahu Puchong, its the shop lots dekat dgn Pelita). At that area itself, ada 4 kedai company yang buat kitchen cabinet and ada 2 kedai jual2 appliances (and sesiapa nak beli barang baby, fabulous mom is there as well!!)

setelah tengok2 kitchen sink, kami berkenan dengan sink ni. Its currently on sale but we decided to check out other places as well. Yang penting,we ols nak sink yang depth dia at least 9 inch.

lepas tu, we went to kedai kitchen cabinet. The price they quote for solid counter top adalah agak mahal kot (cos i think i have seen iklan yang menawarkan harga yang lebih kompetitif) but at least bila dah pergi kedai tu, dapat la ai imagine cemana rupa acrylic, melamine and etc. And dapat juga la sort of idea how we are going to do our wet kitchen. FYI, i plan to have a small kitchen saje sebab i know tahap 'kerajinan' i nak mop and sental kitchen. hihi. But, we decided to jadikan the maid's room our pantry simpan makanan kering and even put our fridge there.

And, we decided to get a freestanding stove/oven instead of a built in punye. Tapi selitkan in between kitchen cabinet tu, to get a built in look. Stove idaman:

I am thinking of painting the walls in the kitchen as well...something bright tapi tak bincang lagi dgn boss.

Anyway, cannot wait to survey2 lagi hal2 kitchen ni. Its so exciting even to google pasal kitchen sampai tergendala kerja2 baca artikel ni!!!

pintu pertahanan

Last Saturday, the boys and I pergi ke puching dengan nawaitu nak beli stroller Aaron. Lepas tu, Dr Sunshine ajak pi Kelang untuk purchase security door.

You see, Dr Sunshine and I dah lama dah cari security door ni (actually Dr Sunshine yang beria, i just ikut ajo). Dari home fair apetah kat midvall, sampai lah ke klang and ampang we ols merantau cari pintu ni. Tapi masa tengah cari ni, punyelah payah nak jumpa kedai jual security door!! (bila dah bayar booking fee, tetiba menjelma pulak kedai2 pintu ni! *geram*)

Anyhoo, masa pi Puchong tu, tiba-tiba my eyes saw kedai pintu masa tengah buat u-turn at some godforsaken place. Terus bgtahu Dr Sunshine and zass ke sana. Unfortunately, pilihan pintu macam non-ado so Dr Sunshine kata, kita pi Kelang kat kedai haritu je lah. Honestly, ai tak berapa berkenan dengan pintu yg dijual di Kelang itu. Its a steel door, powder coated, and 2 layers with secured hinges and also multiple locks (tepi, atas, and bawah). Tapi entah mengapa, hatiku kureng berkenan. Cuma pilihan pintu ittew memenuhi budget kami yang tak seberapa, thats why la nak pi sana gak kan.

Namun demikian, masa dah park kat kedai jual stroller tu, mataku ternampak kedai pintu, right next to the kedai stroller. Oh...adakah ini meant to be? So, kami masuk kedai pintu tu, and memang banyak giller choices dia (compared to kedai in Kelang) and most importantly, pintu yang i berkenan (which i saw first at the fair in midval) was there at a MUCH CHEAPER price!!!!!! Tapi, lepas dah tengok-tengok and berkenan kat satu pintu idaman tu, kami buat jual2 mahal and pi dulu kedai stroller, beli stroller. Pastu, lepas dah beli stroller, Dr Sunshine kata, ingat nak bayar booking fee terus la for the door. And i pon cakap, ok je. Because price wise memang sangat-sangat within our meagre budget and i like the door!!

The door we chose adalah seperti design di atas. It looks macam made of wood but is actually made of steel. Its got secured and hidden hinges, multiple locks, susah nak pry, fire proof and other security features which I cannot remember. So we paid the deposit and they will order the door. It will take about two weeks for them to install the door. Tapi kan, tapi my contractor tak mula pon lagi kerja. Dahla nak bulan puasa. Mak stress okeh!!! Whatever it is, I hope they will start work soon and finish before i balik. They better, ok!!!

If uols berminat, kedai yang we went to is:

Morris Decor,

12a, Jalan Bandar 20, Pusat Bandar Puchong.

They will also be at the home deco fair which is happening now in pwtc and some other home fair in midval in the near future. Mak rasa bertuah sebab dapat harga fair ini uols. If not, the door would cost me about rm600 more. Alhamdullillah.

Lepas ni, projek lampu and kipas pulak. Cannot wait!!!

pengeluaran wang kwsp untuk membayar baki pinjaman rumah

today is day 26 post op and since Dr Sunshine cuti, we decided to pergi kwsp to uruskan pasal pengeluaran duit untuk bayar pinjaman rumah.

word of advice, the first thing u should buat is, make sure u pergi ke bank yang u buat pinjaman tu, and request for a statement of berapa baki pinjaman. make sure u mention u minta tu because nak kluarkan duit kwsp because there is a certain format for the document, which the bank has to follow. The reason i suruh pi bank dulu because it can take between 2 weeks and 1 month for them to prepare the document. sangat menguji kesabaran!!! Oh, the bank will charge you for the documents. Mine (Affin) charged me rm20 for a copy. Just request for a copy because should u and your spouse need to make the withdrawal kat KWSP (and because each person has to sumbit their own set), just fotostat aje document tu, kwsp terima ajer!

Lepas tu, you can start isi borang ( with black pen sahaja) which i think can be downloaded from kwsp punye website (if u know ur pin number). Its borang 9c (AHL) (8d).Tapi ai old skool padahal sebab tak tahu pin number and pergi sendiri ke pejabat kwsp to take the borang and also to check how much is my baki.

Lepas dah dapat bank statement ittew, bolehlah bersama2 suami (if u bought the hse togede-gede and nk kurangkan baki togede gede) ke kwsp untuk mensubmit borang. Stuff u need:

a. ur form

b. a copy of your ic (fotostat depan belakang on the same page)

c.the bank statement thingy

Senang kan? So, inshaAllah, begining next month the money we allocate each month for our house installment can be channeled to our reno plans. Tak banyak sangat pon, but at least adalah something.

Tak sabar tunggu projek next month. Kitchen sink, lampu dan kipas. :)

oh..duit yg kita mohom keluarkan tu will be credited terus ke bank in 2 weeks.Nanti uols akan dapat surat penyata ittew.

And, you are allowed to make the pengeluaran every year. We ols ingat nak keluarkan every three years, just to kurangkan debts cepat2. ihiks. Yela noks. Pinjam sikit. Tapi nak bayar balik, bila dah kena interest tu, mak aii....berpinau jap tengok baki. uhuk.

penat

tadi mengantuk baca article maka decided to sapu rumah. wah...amazing how much one can berpeluh just sapu satu rumah. nasib baik Aaron bekerjasama dan tidur sahaja.

Beginikah perasaan SAHM? Pagi-pagi kejut suami, sediakan breakfast, bukak gate, wave goodbye, buat laundry and tidur balik sementara laundry selesai. Bangun, mandikan anak, mandi, sidai kain, breakfast, check email. Baca article, blog hop, lunch. baca artikel, kemas rumah, angkat kain, lipat kain,tunggu suami dan anak2 balik, bukak gate. mandikan anak-anak, prepare dinner,makan dinner, basuh pinggan, buat coffee for husband, tidur.

inilah routine saya hari-hari. tapi kan. tapi kan. i rasa macam best lah. I especially suka masa hantar suami di muka pintu dan salam-salam, kiss kiss. haih. syurga dunia.

i also like the fact that most of the time, the husband would call me to ask me how i am doing.

i like it when the husband kisses me on the forehead everytime we bid goodbye.

i miss my andi and dani when they are not around (i send them to my moms cos i need to get work done) but when they are around, they can drive me crazy. ihiks.

orang cakap ada boys letih. and now i understand what they mean. when it was just one boy, it was easy to handle. when it was two boys, and the younger one is still a baby, masih easy to handle. tapi bila dua2 dah besar dan boleh bercakap, be ready for their constant bickering and berebut toys and wrestlilng matches which could end up with one of them crying.

my no 1, manja, helpful in school tapi if at home liat sangat when i nak minta tlg. my no 2, is chatterbox and the only time dia senyap is when he's asleep. he gives running commentary to everything. hehe...and, he helps me with everything, even put out my sandals when i was preggers and siap carikan the linolin cream when i complained that sakit breastfeeding aaron. no 3? i am still his milk machine. only cries when hungry, has gas or needs his diaper changed.

ok..tu je. should really finish reading chapter 4. am so SLOW!!!