walaupun jauh

Sometimes, i have this crazy feeling that Dr Sunshine can live his life without me. Yelah, he looks like he is doing fine jaga the boys and etc. Bila time-time perasaan tu datang melanda, I would feel so depressed and useless.

But, Allah is great kan? And I am constantly being reminded of how even though I feel like he does not need me, I still play a BIG role in his life. :-)

Case in point.

1. I am still the one yang belikan baju the boys. Like today, he was telling me, oh..nanti nak kena update wardrobe budak-budak. I was like, ok. Dalam hati, ai tahu, he's not telling me that because dia akan belikan, but in a way telling me that nanti tu, ai la yang kena pi beli. hehe. Yes, the last time the boys had a wardrobe update was when I was last in KL. And, AA lagilah kesian...dok pakai baju abang dia je, well, mostly lah kan. Maka, balik nanti I must shop for baju for the boys.

2. I still have a say in what our house is going to look like. hihi. Tu ai suka. Sebab, we'll be discussing about it online, pastu berebut lukis plan (and siap compare plan sapa lebih cantik) and share it online. :)

3. I babysit the boys while he does his house chores or tengok football albeit through online. Bukan senang ok nak meleraikan pergaduhan online but Alhamdullillah I manage. Otherwise, I just shout for Dr Sunshine (or call him on his mobile) and he'll come in to see whats up. hehe.

And, thanks to technology, I still get to:

1. see my babies go to sleep and hear them say good night mama and i love you. :) And tadi, since the father was outside watching football, I was babysitting them. AA nak tidur but since the Papa was not in the room (selalunya dia akan mengesot/crawl towards the papa to sleep on his lap or in his arms) dia mengesot towards the computer screen (maknanya towards ME) and fell asleep at bucu katil.

2. play with my babies ie: main tembak2 or makan di kedai where AA will jadi waiter and mintak order and pass me my order to the computer screen. hehe

3. watch movies with my babies.

4. read with them although this is kinda hard because they will be pointing at something and ask me what is it, tapi ai tak nampak! hehe

5. nyanyi with them.

Only 4 weeks and 5 more days till I get to hug my babies!!