3 hari lagi

today is the last monday i getto spend with Dr Sunshine. It feels so natural to have him with me and I will certainly be lost without him. tak puas ok to spend just one month together in a year! I really hope to go back this Chirstmas. That is about 8 months away. I hope I will be strong.Must keep myself occupied.

Will be collecting my exam results esok. Nervousnyer mak! If tak pass, kena repeat paper and I dowan to repeat okei. I hope everything will go on smoothly, InsyaAllah.

My mom is also arriving tomorrow. yeay!!! with lotsa goodies from home. Am so happy. She will be staying with me till June 26th. After that, she will go back with Dani. tsk. I will surely miss Mak and Dani. Dahla Dani sekarang petah cakap.

Dani: Mama..mama buat apa tu?
Me: Mama sakit perut
Dani: (rubs my tummy and gave me a hug)

And, we always tell him to not talk while eating. Satu hari, while we were eating, I talked to Dr Sunshine. Terus inspektor Dani tegur mama dia. "Mama...(sambil pointing to his mouth).

And, we also told him that its impolite to stare at people. One day, selepas makan kat restaurant, I was looking at apetah..tak ingat....Si Dani: Mama...tak baik tengok orang. tsk.

Ok..sambung my ramblings. esok, i must call my landlord to get some stuff for my sons residence permit application, gi amik results, cuci gambar Andi and send it to the embassy, go for Andi's ENT appointment at 2pm (aiyoo..my first time taking Andi out, alone!! Dr Sunshine and Dani will be going to the airport to pick up Mak). Kalau sempat, I want to enquire about house insurance from the Bank.

Hmm....i wonder when will my next class commence? Tapi, Easter holidays tak lama lagik. sminggu cuti u ols.

oh, i finally wighed myself. I lost 7kg sajor. neway, B said if i hit below 50 by december, i akan dapat ganjaran. huhu. so, mak berkobar ni u ols nak ilangkan lemak2 degil kat peha ni. hihi. mungkin berpuasa di musim summer will help kot. tapi, since breasfeedingni, manjang selera nak makaannn jer. how??

oklah. must pump susu cos going out tomorrow morning. B said must have at least 6oz. that is either 2 or 3 kali pump. which reminds me, I must start making stock susu for my son!

there are a lot of things on my mind actually. pasal daycare, pasal that document that MA35 nak. hmmm....takpe. InsyaAllah, Allah permudahkan urusan. tapi mak tak senang hati actually, cos tak leh semayang.sigh. takpela. Allah listens to your prayers no matter what, kan?

one week left

Dr Sunshine will leave for KL next Thursday. I am so going to miss him. I am going to miss talking to him IRL. nak hug, kiss, someone to help around with the boys. sigh.

sedih, tak yah cakap la. mmg sedih. i have been crying myself to sleep thinking of how i am going to live without him for the next 8 months. tu pon ifi go back for christmas. i am so going to miss you beb. i have been depending on you so much this past 3 weeks that i am not sure if i can be that independent person when u go.

i am glad i have got everything that i must do settled while he is still around. i have gone and buat the boys' residence permit, insurance, sat for my exam, set up andi's appointment with his pead and ent doctor.

yang tinggal is just to mintak that unterkunft from my landlord, hantar gambar andi and geburtskunde and copy of payment to embassy, register at uni (once i get my results..mintak2 saya pass), and submit my 6 months progress report.

aiyoo...dalam diam..dah almost 6 months dah i have been living here. huhu. hmm..i better start looking for the progress report form ittew. nak tengok apa yg perlu diisi. (yang...please bagi mak some tips....)

oh...me and Dr Sunshine have also been trying to toilet train Dani. Dani is getting better at it. on some days, no accident at all. tapi i find that if its the day after kitaorg jalan2 (maknanya semalam tu we went out and so he was on diapers) confirm akan accident.

the papa has made an agreement with Dani, if ada accident, no bobthebuilder for him. he is just so adorable la my Dani. I still feel guilty when i marah2 dia. tsk. but i cannot help it. Mama is so sorry Dani.

Oh..and we have started to prepare him with the fact that papa will be going back and dani will stay with mama.

hmm..

beb, i dah rindu pon kat u.

suri rumah

sungguhpun Dr Sunshine does most of the stuff here in my house sebab kesiankan wife dia yang dalam pantang (tapi macam tak pon), i still do the cooking. cuma some nights, Dr Sunshine akan goreng hot dog (he makes the best hot dogs...crispy kat luar..sedaappp), burger, fish fingers or nuggets or occasionally pizza.

neway, memandangkan dah ter-inspired from blog LG and fiza, mak pon berkunjung ke myresipi.com. dan hari ini, sayatelah berjaya memasak nasi goreng kunyit. wehee...

i swear, duduk di perantauan helps to hone ur culinary skills. haritu, i made kari daging, kurma ayam, sotong kicap, ikan sweet sour, sup salad...and lelain, mak tak ingat.

random stuff:

esok nak pergi buat residence permit Dani.

i need to get some milk storage thingy.

should i get a baby carrier yg macam sling tu? i saw one at the lilcaliph. cantik tapi harganya juger cantik (rm258). but i was thinking that it would be easy for me to carry andi around. ke stroller sudah memadai??

should i get a nursing cover? it would be easier to feed andi in public kan. skarang, mak terpaksa menggunakan skill untuk feed andi jika dia menangis (i hv done it in the tram, at a tram stop, in shoping malls, at the embassy, kedai makan, pendek kata..merata tempat dah mak bf si andi ittew). kat sini tak ada feeding room...not like mesia.

what should i ask my mother to bring for me when she comes next week yer?

pukul 2.32am

all my boys are sound asleep. i am awake cos i slept early (i think about 7 plus) and woke up at about 12.30 to change Andi's diaper and also hv dinner.

in about a week, Dr Sunshine will be returning to Mesia. I hate to think about it. Tadi, while watching him talking to Andi, i got teary eyed. sedih u ols cos the next time we will see him is probably on December, which is about 8 months away.

My Sunshine has been the greatest help ever. I seriously don't know how I managed to be on my own before this!. Skarang, laundry pon mak still blom pernah buat ok. Even mandikan Andi pon tak buat2 lagi. Mandikan Dani baru sekali sajo. How will I survive nie???

I am going to miss him. And I hardly have time nak bermanja2 dgn Sunshine pon. Cos everytime nak cuddle ke apa, adalaaaaaa budak kicik tu nak join sekaki. if not, it will be Andi crying for attention. I am so going to miss my Sunshine.

Babe, thank you for coming to be with me.Thank you for doing all that you hvae done. Thank you for understanding. Thank you for being the bestest husband ever.

All of my heart, forever.

p/s: am getting him a sat nav for his belated birthday prezzie. He has wanted it since forever. huhu.

being random

Siapa cakap orang buat c-sect tak leh pakai bengkung bagai? I was in fact dibengkungkan oleh spital sejurus selepas pembedahan okei.

I am still wondering how much I weigh!! I don’t have a weighing scale and the need to know is killing me. Dr Sunshine suggested that I weigh myself at one of the scales yg slalu diletakkan di tepi tram stops (in the open ok...tak faham betul konsep depa nie..) tapi mak tak rela sebab segan!!

I can cross out menaiki ambulans from my things i have yet to do list!

Dani is a good brother. I often find him baring tepi Andi sambil tepuk2 Andi when I rush in upon hearing Andi nangis. Tapi..semua toys Andi is assumed as his.

I am juggling to be a wife and mother to two kids. Dani craves for attention so much so sometimes i have to breastfeed sambil dani tido kat my lap. A real exercise I tell you.

I made curry beef and it turned out ok!

I did not really pantang. Aside from eating pil ikan haruan and jamu perawan (thanks Nana!) yang kengkadang pon ingat2 lupa nak makan, and slathering myself with minyak menara (thanks Eus! Memang sedap pakai and rasa panas jerr...speshly dalam musim sejuk ni. I highly recommend minyak ini), saya berpantang secara rock!

At 7 days post delivery, I was already out and about. I have to settle a lot of stuff and Dr Sunshine tak leh tolong buat cos he doesn’t understand Deutch. And, I have been eating chicken and eggs (walaupun telah dilarang oleh MIL). Saya cuma tak makan cendawan sebab mak saya pesan jangan makan. Hehe.

Andi dah ada birth cert Austria tapi birth cert Mesia non ado. Apekah?

Oh...mungkin juga sebab saya banyak berjalan(pi embassy, pi settle insurance anak-anak, pi resheculde exam date,pi beli washing machine, pi set up internet connection,pi window shopping,pi beli stroller, pi buat grocery ...all within about 2 weeks of delivery, saya boleh membuka jeans size uk14 saya tanpa membuka button mahupun zip. *happy*

how do you get rid of cellullite?? and flabs di bahagian perut? adakah saya kena membuat tummy tuck seperti teknik yang diwar-warkan oleh ayang?

saya dah buat exam harini. tp saya koya masa listening part. *menyesal*. result will be out on march 31st.

saya masih fully breastfeed andi. tp slalu panik if susu yg di pump tak cukup when i go out to run my errands.

Dr Sunshine is the greatest husband ever.

We are in the midst of toilet training Dani. Sometimes tak de accident. Sometimes dia terkencing dlm seluar.And sometimes, we find bombs kat rumah. hihi.

Welcome Ahmad Andi

Meet Ahmad Andi


I am actually writing this on words because my new flat has yet to be equipped with internet. I have yet to have the time to go to upc to subscribe to internet. Why is that? Because, my lovely son, Ahmad Andi decided to come into the world a week early (and on my exam date to boot!)


It all started on Sunday, march 1st. In the morning,when i went to pee, i saw that i had blood stains. I started to panic but Dr Sunshine said that it is just an indication of early stage of labour and i didn’t have to worry. Oh...ok. Furthermore, I wasn’t experiencing any contractions or whatever. Jadi, mak relax-relax jer sambil kengkonon study cos my exam is the next day.


At around noon, I started to feel mild pain at my lower abdomen which I assumed was contraction pain. But, i wasn’t too bothered cos it wasn’t frequent, and it was not that painful. Petang tu, we decided to bring dani to the park near my flat. Dah pergi park tu, Dani teringin plak nak naik tram (he lovesloves to go on the tram). So, I told Dr Sunshine, jomla...we can just naik tram and pusing2. So we did. Tapi, mak gatal nak berenti kat Oper, and berjalan all the way to Stephansdome (sambil singgah di Kartner Strasse untuk melantak Nordsee’s Mix Box) dan kemudian ke Aida to belanja my babe melange and cake.

bercanda di taman

Masa jalan tu, memang dah rasa sakit2 yer and i had to berenti a few times while walking. Tapi mak tetap gigih and bebuat macho depan Dr Sunshine. Hihi.


Pastu, balik, and i started to study dengan begitu gigih. However, I kept having contractions. At about 11pm, I decided that I should get some sleep cos I would have to be at the exam hall by 9am, which means that i would have to leave my flat at about 7.45am (memandangkan mak bajet mak akan take my own sweet time to jalan because of the contraction pain).


Tapi, I couldn’t sleep! The pain was getting unbearable by the minute. I started timing my contractions at it was about 5 to 7 minutes apart. I woke my babe up and asked him to time my contraction dan mengharapkan simpati, tapi dia kata :“what’s the point? Bukan kita nak buat apa pon because you ada exam esok.”


He also said that if we were in Malaysia, he would have brought me to the hospital already. At 12 plus, mak dah tak tahan dengan sakit ittew. And my hubby said, lets just call the ambulance and go to the hospy. Whats the point of waiting? Lagipon dengan sakit yg sebegitu rupa, i don’t think I can concentrate doing my paper!!!


Nak tepon ambulance plak satu hal. A machine answered and it was of course speaking Deutch. So, I called my Tante, and she (actually her hubby) helped to call the ambulance. Tak lama lepas tu, ambulance pon tiba. I was strapped to the wheelchair, brought down to the ambulance, transferred to the bed, and dibawa masuk ke dalam krankenwagen ittew.


FYI, ambulance adalah kenderaan yg sangat tak selesa and I wonder la kan, cemana laaaaa orang yg eksiden sume tu kena naik ambulance. Sian depa. I feld nauseus okei naik ambulance. Tapi, Dr Sunshine macam sexcited (rujuk gambar) sementara dani plak macam konfius (what am i doing in here in the middle of the night?). As for me, I was too busy gripping onto the bed to tahan sakit.

Dalam ambulans


Sampai kat spital, masuk bilik yg cek2 tu. Midwife yg menerima kehadiran mak ittew agak lembap! All that she could offer was: bila contraction, sila tarik nafas dan lepas macam ni...foooooooooooooooooo. FYI, teknik pernafasan yg diajar tidak membantu langsung di dalam mengurangkan rasa sakit okei!!!


To cut the long story short, she called the doc, doc dtg cek the opening (about 3cm) and said that sila pergi labour room. Sebelum ittew, Doc tanya: “Nak tak epidural?” Jawab saya :”Kena bayar extra ke? Insurance saya cover tak?”
“Ya,” kata Doktor.
“Then yessssssss,” I said sambil pandang2 kat Dr Sunshine and dani.

epidural makes me happyyyyyyyyyyyy


So, I walked to the labour room dan teruja melihat labour room yang jauuuhhhhh berbeza dgn the one in slyg. Firstly, its a room on its own, bukan cubicles separated with curtains. Pastu,ada toilet and shower, ada radio, and all the other necessity. I had my own midwife to entertain me and bless her, she could converse in English. I was feeling cold so she gave wrapped me up with hot towels. Sedap sangat!!


Then, i had epidural done on me (saya sangat respek specialist ittew kerana tidak mengambil masa yang lama untuk memberikan saya pain relief tersebut). And, I have decided that I WILL be opting for epidural for my next labour. Err..tapi next labour c-sect jugek so mungkin epidural tidakdiperlukan. Tapi seriously, it really helped to ease the pain. So much so, lepas epi, doctor nak cek my opening, 10,000 kali pon, saya tak kesah. Huhu.


Oh..and the hospital I went also uses homeopathic treatments. I was given some herbal medication to help y servix dilate and also some kind of herbal obat was swiped at my servix to make it softer or something like that.


7 am plus, doctor dtg sekali lahi and found that there is no difference in my dilation. And to make matters worst my contraction apparently was becoming further apart (8 minutes). So, depa decide to burst my water. Lepas 1 hour dah pecahkan water bag, still no further dilation. And so, the doctor came and advised me to go for c-sect. What can i say? I was really hoping for a normal birth (cos bercita-cita nak anak banyak kan) tapi nak buat cemana. I was frustrated but at that point, Andi’s wellbeing was more important than my selfish needs ittew.


So, c-sect it was. This time around, I was awake the whole time tapi MasyaAllah, rasa nak muntah ajer. I heard Andi’s first cry. Dr Sunshine could have been in the labour room with me but he had to take care of Dani. (btw, Dani and papa waited for me sambil tertido kat couch...the hospy actually gave them a folded bed tapi Dr Sunshine tak mo plaks).


At 10.36am, Ahmad Andi came into the world. Berat 3.2kg. Rupa, sebijik macam Dani. Macam fotostat. But at birth, he is a bit fairer although skarang nampak macam dah tukar kaler sket. Ihiks.

mungkin yang terakhir kalinya

My boys will be arriving in a few hours!!! *lompat-lompat kegirangan*

Anyhoo, since I have yet to subscribe to internet/cable tv/ phone line at my new apartment, i don't think i will be going online that much. Lagikpon, the reason I am online in the first place is to chat/ talk/ keep in touch with my babies and now that they will be with me IRL, tak de la saya akan online sgt kan. hihi. I need to make out up for lost times!

Next monday will be my exam. After that, I will be busy with Dani's insurance and residence permit application.

I hope to beranak after everything selesai.

Di kesempatan ini, I would like to minta maaf for any wrong doings, ter-apa-apa (makan, minum, kecikkan hati, etc) ok. yelah u ols. mak nak beranak ni, so u never know what can or may happen in the labour room kan? so,minta maaf and thanks for everything.

Pastu, to my dearest family, gang projek, gang badminton kg tunku, PICs and geng rombongan cik Kiah (u know who u r), I love you ols and thanks yer for being there for me when I needed you ols! thanks for the encouragement and for making me believe in myself. *feeling-feeling bagi speech mcm kat AcademyAwards*

Please doakan everything will be ok. And I hope to come back again soon with a picture of me and my little family.

Assalammualaikum